Today Penn students will begin leaving for warmer / colder / homier climes, and we can’t help but wonder: what will go down while we’re gone? Here’s our best guess:
1. Wawa employees dance wildly to Wawa music
2. VP workers check their own bags
3. Food trucks outside the Quad become a free giveaway buffet potentially culminating with a choreographed dance sequence starring Lyn and the two Le Anhs.
Read the rest of this entry »
Yesterday, anonymous frat pledges suited up in their best Mario Kart garb and raced down Locust Walk in what appear to be Fresh Grocer shopping carts. Luigi was nowhere to be seen (sources close to the racers cited a sibling squabble), but apparently Yoshi had a medical problem because he was spotted with really, really long tongue. No word yet on who came in first — but the real winner here is the expert photographer who snapped this shot. Wanna work for us, bb?
Everyone’s favorite honey-voiced misogynist is apparently at CHOP right now, giving some kind of interview. What business does Paula Patton’s Slimy Ex-Husband have at a hospital, you may ask? Maybe he’s going deaf! Maybe he’s going blind! Maybe he’s out of his myyyyy god that’s stuck in my head for the next week now.
Uh, what? It’s March already???
Spring break might be right around the corner but it feels like just yesterday we were fretting over finals and flying home for Thanksgivukkawinterbreak. Yet here we are, halfway to May.
Take a deep breath.
If this semester feels like it’s been going faster than usual, it’s probably because…
- …we’ve had so many snow days that winter break never actually ended.
- …snow days—even snow hours—are still worth hoping for.
- …CVS still has old, half-off Valentine’s day stuff out.
- …we still have to look at our schedule to see what classes we have today.
- …we haven’t been to enough office hours to warrant asking for a rec letter.
- …we’re still wearing our fur-hooded coats, scarves, hats—the works.
- …our parents have verbalized that they’ve seen us too recently.
- …midterms are still a very, very real phenomenon.
- …we’re still doing OCR.
- …the most beach bod prep we’ve done is a walk to the fridge during a House of Cards marathon.
- …we still haven’t made break plans.
- …we’ll be wearing UGGs to the airport.
- …I’m paler than UTB’s page layout.
- …still don’t have my littlest.
- …we’re failing miserably this semester but convincing ourselves it’s okay because it feels like the second week of class.
~Nevertheless, we’re just grateful for a week off to cuddle with our dogs!~
Oozing class, one snore at a time.
Is it just us or is someone sleeping in every public place on campus? It’s midterm season. We’re tired. But the budding socialite in us all knows that we need still need to SABS. Even when we’re taking a study snooze break, our peers are watching.
Here is the OFFICIAL list of the #sceniest places to nap at Penn:
1. The big chairs in Houston
Everybody who’s anybody has napped in one of the big chairs on the right side of Houston Hall. Grab your teriyaki bowl, put a book on your lap so it looks like you were just doing something, and snooze away. Be warned though: everyone you know will walk by and stare. But hey, that’s what being scene-y is about, right?!?
2. 6th floor of Van Pelt
Any old Quaker can nap on the lower floors of Van Pelt; in the chairs in the basement, the cubicles, the East Asia room on the 5th floor. Read the rest of this entry »
Now on Penn’s campus, Crunchbutton is a website and iPhone app (originally designed by Yale students) that allows people to order popular dishes online from local restaurants that don’t usually deliver. Imagine: Wawa, Sweetgreen, and/or Chipotle in your mouth with a click of a button–finally your wildest dreams have come true!
This happiness does come at a rather steep price: a medium side of mac and cheese from WaWa will set you back almost $8 with the automatic tip added. Additionally, the site’s hours of operation seem to be a little off (restaurants randomly “close” during the day), and we were confused by the picture of the sports car with the caption ”Be a Delivery Biker!” on the homepage. But despite all this, we are still ecstatic to finally have a start-up we can get on board with and we can’t wait until that burrito bowl is cradled safely in our immobile arms.
It is HEATING UP in this piece. The Meagles are a cold people, but “Parks & Recreation” icon Retta is coming to Penn as SPEC Connaissance’s spring speaker on March 24. She may technically have a last name, but we will not report it, as the queen deservedly appears on “Parks” without one – and was just upgraded to the opening sequence after Rashida and Rob left!
Retta, a Duke alum and onetime chemist, plays Donna Meagle, the most underrated gem of modern television comedies and this post’s author’s favorite human being/Twitter nemesis. (Retta is also notorious for her TV live tweets, and you know UTB will do the same with her appearance in Harrison Auditorium.) Last year, SPEC hosted SNL’s Jason Sudeikis, so we approve of keeping it in the NBC fam...time after time.
IT'S OK TO DOUBLE DIP --
While Penn students love finding solutions
to previously solved problems
, Double Count at Penn
may actually make your life easier. The site helps you easily find courses (with codes!) that double count for requirements for Fall 2014. So procrastinate for midterms with mock scheduling (as if you weren't already) – double dipping never tasted so good.
Unless you’re a freshman, you’ve realized that sublet season is the Regina George of your summer plans (the bitch that
stole Aaron Samuels ruins EVERYTHING). Finding a room or a subletter can be tough…like speaking up when the Houston salad gal skimps you on candied walnuts tough. And you want your room to be clean? Forgetaboutit.
We want to hear your WORST sublet stories. Whether you were the victim or the perpetrator, we won’t judge, just send them to email@example.com and check back to see the worst ones after break. Who knows, the story could be, and probably is, about you!
In the meantime, use the DP’s new and improved PennLets to unsketchify your summer 2014 subletting.
FEDERAL DONUTS REALLY OPENING MONDAY
-- After a confusing tweet saga
last time, UTB can officially confirm the Sansom location is coming for us on March 10 (yes, break)! Shout it
from the rooftops.