UncategorizedMay 29, 2009 at 2:00 am

Vinny Price Gets Promoted

Our thoughts about COMM125 aside, it looks like Vincent Price has turned his interim provost term into a permanent one (Penn put a ring on it, if you will). Penn’s Twitterati was abuzz about the announcement that came to students via a glowing e-mail from Amy Gutmann herself (we love her e-mail address, by the way: president@upenn.edu). Granted, much of the tweeting was in relation to former provost Ron Daniels’s “dreaminess.” Daniels left Penn in February to be president of Hopkins, at which time a collective sigh was heard from Penn’s male-loving population (or at least from those who knew who the hell he was). While we won’t vouch for any sort of Price yum-factor, we have posted the following video in his honor (our first choice was “Thriller”, but Michael Jackson’s manservants have disabled embedding):

UncategorizedMay 28, 2009 at 5:32 pm

Street…In The Summer!

Although the school year’s over, summer session classes are in session, which means an abridged version of Street is officially on newsstands. For the outdoors-inclined, check out the feature on camping in the fine state of New Jersey. Or, if you’re feeling old as another year goes by, read about Green Day’s 40-year-old members (and other summer music). But “If Life Gives You Lemons,” learn how you can rock a screenprinted bag or t-shirt. And, Street is once again obsessed with sign language!

UncategorizedMay 26, 2009 at 10:37 am

“Why Penn” Essay, In YouTube Form

As the incoming freshmen anxiously await their housing assignments, us upperclassmen are feeling a bit nostalgic. We’ve reported on the Penn YouTube channel before, but we came across this video just recently. Maybe we’re huge nerds at UTB, but this clip gives us goosebumps (well, up until the five minute mark, when it becomes a fundraising plea). The shots of the Quad! And College Hall! And all the smart people! And the music! You’re killing us, Amy.

UncategorizedMay 25, 2009 at 10:11 pm

How Awesome Is Your Summer? Don’t Worry, We’ll Tell You

It’s summertime, and you might be wondering just how great your gig is for the season. Sure, you know if it’s what you wanted to do, but what good is that when you aren’t sure how it compares to what everyone else is doing? We understand, which is why we’re bringing you the UTB Summer Approval Matrix. The grid, inspired by a feature in one of our favorite magazines, can help you figure out where you stand in the hierarchy of summer.

UncategorizedMay 25, 2009 at 12:11 am

Buttoning It Up With Dolly Parton

It seems that our very own namesake was home to the 18th performance in Anthology Project’s “Dance: 31,” an exhibition in which artist Thomas Choinacky will spend the entirety of May dancing to a different song in a different location each day. For a group that describes its purpose as “keeping the audience on their toes with edgy work…and innovative performance spaces,” we’d expect a little more than this failed-flash-mob-esque display. However, we do find the graduate poking her head out of the button hole, assumedly for an embarrassing picture, pretty entertaining.

Keep your eye out for more mediocre dancing, or even suggest your own location.

UncategorizedMay 25, 2009 at 12:00 am

Sports For Chicks: Quit Bawlin’ ‘Bout Graduation and Start Ballin’

Sort of like UTB, actually.

Sort of like UTB, actually.

Sports for Chicks contributor Lily Avnet is back! This time, she dissects the NBA Playoffs.

Just as you can expect graduation every year, so can you expect the NBA Playoffs. You might have a vague memory of caring slightly about basketball during that crazy thing called March Madness. This time around, we’ve moved on from watching UPenn score (sometimes) to enjoying profesh playas like Kobe Bryant and Wally Szczerbiak (side note: Wally hails from Miami, Ohio, a hybrid city-state? WTF.)

At the moment we’ve entered the Western (Lakers vs. Nuggets) and Eastern (Cavalier vs. Magic) Conference Finals where each team battles it out in the best of seven games.  Essentially look at these teams as a brief list of fun places to visit. LA, Denver, Orlando, and Cleveland — maybe just look at an online brochure of the Forest City?

So here are the names to keep in mind when someone inevitably brings up last night’s game at the water cooler of your summer internship.

Orlando Magic

Hedo Turkoglu– From Turkey, a name that makes sense (also a possible infomercial during Thanksgiving)

Dwight Howard– He does so much charity, so he definitely knows Dwight from wrong. Read the rest of this entry »

UncategorizedMay 24, 2009 at 3:22 pm

The Liposuction One Is Our Fave

Sometimes us undergrads forget about all of the impressive post-grad stuff Penn’s involved with. For example, despite our horrific student health experiences (“Are you sure you’re not pregnant?” “I just told you my throat feels scratchy!”), Penn has an impressive health care system, no doubt due to their sick med school.

So we were weirded out to stumble upon the Medical Animation Library on the Penn Health site. You click on any number of bodily functions (snoring!), health ailments (gout!), or surgical procedures (breast lifts!) and are routed to an animated video on the topic. We guess this is supposed to inform patients and maybe keep down patient flow, a la Web MD? (By the way, the videos are seemingly lifted from A.D.A.M. The Inside Story, the awesome computer game our doctor aunt got for us before she realized science wasn’t our thing.)

UncategorizedMay 22, 2009 at 9:10 pm

Smartphone Envy

Who doesn’t love swag? I mean, when you’re paying like a gajillion of your parents’ hard-earned dolla dolla billz to go to school here, a few kickbacks (besides that whole world-class education thing) would be pretty cool. A few years ago, Duke gifted frosh with iPods. Earlier this month we learned that those kids over at Princeton would be getting Kindles. Now we hear that Indiana University MBA students will get special deals on BlackBerrys. Not to get all Veruca Salt on you (I want one NOW, Amy!), but can you imagine what would happen if Penn got in on such a program? (That was a rhetorical question, but HUP would probably have to build a BBM addict wing or something.)

UncategorizedMay 22, 2009 at 1:44 am

12-Year-Old Attempts To Mug Penn Prof

This makes us sad (and reminds us of last summer’s shenanigans), courtesy of the Philadelphia Daily News:

Neighbors came to the aid of a University of Pennsylvania archeology professor who was robbed at gunpoint Thursday night, police sources said.

The 52-year-old professor, whose name was not released, was approached by two thieves – ages 12 and 15 – near his car on Windsor Avenue near 47th Street about 7:45 p.m.

When the older crook aimed a handgun at the professor, several residents on Windsor Avenue came out of their houses and shouted at the young robbers, the sources said.

The young suspects ran off, but were apprehended minutes later by 18th District cops who had responded to neighbors’ 9-1-1 calls.

They were charged with robbery and weapons offenses, sources said.

We can’t quite deduce who said prof is, but we’re glad his neighbors came to the rescue.

UncategorizedMay 20, 2009 at 12:29 pm

Capogiro Is Open!

From zero to sixty in two-ish weeks, Capogiro sure got its act together quick.  The store opened today!  Just in time for…well, nothing, because everyone just went home for the summer.  Still, though.  Gelato!