UA Candidates Take You On A Journey Through Song

There are a few constants in this world: Death. Taxes. The earth continuing to orbit the sun. And of course, student government candidates making promotional videos. This year’s crop has a distinctly musical bent, making the already strong case against autotune even stronger. Behold – 2011′s most meme-friendly requests for your vote! We’ve got our ratings/”endorsements” after the jump.

Quakémon (see above), by Dan Bernick (Candidate for UA Vice President)

Complete with demonstrations of athletic ability and familiarity with Hillel and Commons, Mr. Bernick has put together a campaign video that mimics the Pokémon theme song. He gains points for upping the nostalgia quotient, and some upped cred from getting the Penn Quaker involved, but we have to issue two demerits based on the overall dated-ness of Pokémon jokes. We give this a “Vote If You Were Ash Ketchum For Halloween (In 2010).”

Tyler and Faye for UA, by Tyler Ernst and Faye Cheng (Candidates for UA President and Vice President, respectively)

This certainly is the ticket that keeps on giving! Not wanting to miss out on the timeliness of Rebecca Black’s horrific “Friday,” Tyler and Faye capitalized on the easily modifiable lyrics and ever-endearing charm of autotune. Sure, it’s just as cringe-worthy as the original, but we’ve got to admire the speed with which they threw this whole thing together – choreography is time consuming! Also, kudos on the Street shoutout. We say “Vote If You Can’t Get ‘Friday’ Out Of Your Head Now, Thanks A Lot Guys.”

Election 2011, by Abe Sutton and Cynthia Ip (Candidate for UA Representative and 2014 Class Board VP of Finance, and Class Board Member and UA Representative, respectively)

And in this corner, we’ve got Abe Sutton and Cynthia Ip. Abe and Cynthia lend their own personal spin to the Lonely Island’s Akon-supported “I Just Had Sex.” Jury’s still out on whether they managed to pull this one off – there’s a pretty flagrant disregard for rhythm and rhyme, but we’re suckers for a good Button visual (especially when the Simpsons are involved). We’d recommend that you “Vote If You Really (Like, REALLY Really) Get A Kick Out Of Voting.”