NewsJuly 16, 2014 at 11:07 am

Chow On The Cheap: The 10th Annual Dining Days Are Here

diningdaysCalling all individuals who need food to survive: University City’s 10th Annual Dining Days starts tomorrow, July 17th and runs until Sunday, the 27th.

A buncha restaurants in the area are offering 3 (three!) course meals for either a set $15, $25, or $35—depending on the restaurant. So now’s your chance to head to the place you your wallet was always too shy to try, and to scoff at Penne for having no moral qualms about placing itself in the $35 bracket. Or, stick with your 15-dolla faves, including Saigon, Pattaya, and orange you glad we said Copabanana?

Peep the deets, the deals, and the list of participating restaurants here

NewsJuly 3, 2014 at 11:58 am

ICYMI: Our University Played A Crucial, Prominent Role In NYTimes Crossword


Did you know Ben Franklin founded our school? Yes? Then you would’ve absolutely killed 3-Down on the NYTimes crossword from a couple days ago—unless you’re the poor soul that’s still convinced “UPenn” has four letters. Other fun facts about Benjamin Franklin: he was also a Founding Father of our nation (the United States of America), and his name was Benjamin Franklin.

uuǝԀ :ɹǝʍsu∀

FeaturesMay 22, 2014 at 3:00 pm

Things To Accomplish Before Summer Ends

turtle beachAh, summertime: a glorious three months sans Ivy Fatigue that many of us choose to fill with classes and internships anyway. Be yourself! Live a little! are just two of the things on UTB’s li’l checklist to help you make the most of summer. Third? Take a sec to admire this corgi’s patience ↗

Wherever you are and whatever you’re doing this summer, here’s the rest of that list:

❏ Finish the episodes of ‘Game of Thrones’ you didn’t get through during reading days
❏ Father’s Day is June 15th. Do something with that information.
❏ Former freshmen: lose the 15
❏ Penn ’15: get vaccinated for senioritis Read the rest of this entry »

FeaturesMay 8, 2014 at 2:29 am

UTB’s End Of Year Overheard Roundup

what that u sayHello and thank you for choosing this post as your procrastination destination today. Since 34th Street is out on hiatus/taking a rest till next semest, UTB, like a good sister site, has put together a list of verbalizations overheard on and around campus recently. Enjoy.

Warning: people are awful.

Frat guy buying a drink at Starbucks: I’m such a white girl.
Second frat guy: Well it’s better than being a black girl.

Resumaybe: I creeped on the LinkedIn of the guy I hooked up with on Tinder…

AXO Formal: I love Jane Austen. ‘Clueless’ is amazing.

In an OkCupid message to a Jewish female: I’m not interested in a date but would like to discuss gentrification with you.

Capo Customer: Yeah, like, this weird guy I don’t know liked all my photos on Facebook…So then I was creeping and, like, he’s in a wheelchair so he must be socially awkward.

Girl 1: I don’t think monogamy is for you.
Girl 2: …but it is…

Radian racist: She’s really Asian looking though. Her eyes are slitty as fuck. [Her name] is really attractive, but she’s black.

FeaturesMay 2, 2014 at 12:09 pm

Finals Trends: A Graphical 2D Experience

Ah, finals: because your self esteem is too high and because midterms aren’t cruel and unusual enough. We hate to get all mathetmatical on ya—especially in this trying time, but with the use of some very scientific numerical raw data, we’ve put together a list of graphs that 2-dimensionalize (?) the finals experienstruggle. Whether you’re deciding on if it’s a good time to start ‘Game of Thrones’ or are just “seriously screwed,” scroll down and look at the pretty pictures already.

graph slides

graph sun

Read the rest of this entry »

NewsApril 25, 2014 at 11:14 am

Drunk Fight In Vegas: George Clooney VS Steve Wynn


Movie idea: powers clash as alum/Wynn Commons namesake gets into a tipsy tussle with George Clooney in a Vegas hotel. Based on a true story, because apparently that’s what happened over dinner a few nights ago. The brawl was only verbal but when heinous comments are made about one’s presidential friends, it sure as hell feels like sticks and stones. As The Monuments Man himself explained:

I said the President was my longtime friend and then he said “your friend is an asshole.” … At that point I told Steve that HE was an asshole and I wasn’t going to sit at his table while he was being such a jackass.

It’s still Up In The Air as to who ended up Wynning.

NewsApril 24, 2014 at 11:37 am

YouTube Legend MysterGuitarMan Is Shooting On Campus

If you aren’t already aware of this stop motioning musical genius, educate yourself stat:

Judging by this ↓ recent tweet, you might be able to catch MGM doing his thing out and about the Engineering quad. Keep your eyes and ears peeled for whatever systematic cinematic robotic magic he’s shooting here.

Read the rest of this entry »

CAPS is moving next year -- their new home at 3624 Market will be 3,624 times better, with more square footage and group therapy space. Additional deets over at the DP.
FeaturesApril 15, 2014 at 3:29 pm

Your Fling Photos Are In: Reliving Spring Fling 2K14

flingstanleyAs we collectively wallow in this rainy post-Fling Tuesday, we can only hope ya didn’t have to untag too many pictures or explain to your parents why they received a Dominos pizza delivery at 2am on Saturday (It’s a long not even a long story).

Either way, this moody weather gives us the perfect excuse to reflect on what transpired this past weekend, and there’s no better medium to do this than through the contemporary photograph. Without further ado about nothing, here’s our roundup of the Fling photos you sent us, or hashtagged with #flingstagram:





Nothing unites strangers like the 3am drive for calories. Here we observe an eclectic medley of organisms gathering around the oasis that is ol’ McDonald’s.



Read the rest of this entry »

ContestsApril 10, 2014 at 6:45 pm

UTB Photo Contest: Hashtag Your #Flingstagrams!

flingstanleyAyyyyyy Fling is upon us, people! Whether you’re already intoxicated WITH KNOWLEDGE from your Thursday classes or not, listen up. UTB has thrown together a little scavenger hunt so if you like scavenging and you like hunting, participate in our photo contest. Below is a list of items for you to seek—some things open to interpretation.

❑ Abandoned, toppled solo cup (make it arsty~***)
❑ Scene that embodies “oh no, is that kid okay?”
❑ Wawa line that exceeds 10 people long
❑ Frat president in handcuffs
❑ UTB fling tank (+100 if you come say hi)
❑ Obvious undercover LCA agent
❑ Penn Band fanfare, in Mayfair
❑ Freshman drinking on the down-low, in Lo-Fi
❑ Getting toasted, in Toaster
❑ Person actively and consciously enjoying Qdoba
❑ Vom trail that ends at a toilet
❑ Vom trail that doesn’t end at a toilet
 Somebody flinging a literal, coiled spring
❑ David Guetta doing whatever it is that he does on stage
❑ Scene that best describes “Peace Love and Fling”

Hashtag with


and you’re good to go.

Whoever knocks out the most of these bad boys out by midnight on Monday, April 14th gets a cute li’l write-up in a future post and even better, mad love from everyone here at UTB. So go out, take some shots, and take some shots!

If you’re more of a thousand words rather than a picture guy, send us your texts!