This is a fairly accurate portrayal of how crowded our apartments are this summer.
The unpaid internship. Like many undergraduate rites of passage, it makes no sense to outsiders. Outsiders consider working for no money unlawful. They believe an unpaid intern should at least receive academic credit. Naturally the powers-that-be at Penn translate “academic credit” to mean “a happy face on your transcript that does not help you graduate.”
Yet we, the unpaid intern masses, understand the importance of Experience. We are people-meeting, connection-making, knowledge-absorbing students of the summer. And, as the Times reports today, we want Experience so badly, we will do whatever it takes to get it. We will find living arrangements where no housing actually exists. We will sleep on the floor.
It’s the 40th anniversary of Woodstock this weekend. You know that. You can’t not know that. The only way to be unaware of this fact would be to crawl underground with your eyes squeezed shut and your fingers jammed in your ears. On one level it’s kind of annoying; after all, we’re talking about arguably the greatest party in the history of parties, a free free-for-all with iconic performances by real deal rock stars and an audience of half-a-million-strong slathered in mud having sex and taking acid/getting stoned/popping pills like tic tacs/etc. etc. The ultimate musical cultural experience… and we all missed it. Read the rest of this entry »
There might be 1000 awesome things to say about this picture.
Viral Vocabulary. You use it all the time, even if you don’t know what it is. (That is, if you’ve ever said “epic fail” or “F My Life“.) It’s that thing you say at first as a joke and then completely by accident. In fact, you can hear yourself use and abuse the term as it makes the inevitable evolution from “hilarious addition to the lexicon” to “most annoying saying on the planet” in a matter of months. Our current favorite viral vocab word? “Awesome.” Read the rest of this entry »
Was “The Nightman Cometh”, last season’s finale of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, a success? It depends on your definition of success. If by “success” you mean “Charlie finally scored with the coffee shop waitress he’s been stalking all this time,” then you’d most likely consider the thirty minute musical a classic, epic failure, like that other Charlie’s futile attempt to kick a football. However, if you’re thinking that selling out the Troubador twice back in April with a live rendition of said episode is a success, then the Sunny cast is very, very successful. So successful, in fact, that they’re pulling a Kerouac and taking their musical on the road. The Times reports that the tour is set to kick off in Boston on September 15. The season premiere of Sunny is two days later, and by the end of the month the gang from Paddy’s will have entertained Philly, L.A., New York, San Francisco and Seattle. To get caught up on the singing, dancing, spandex-attired performance that inspired the traveling show, check out a video clip here.
This is just here because we like puppies. Plus they're eating, which is pretty relevant.
We didn’t want to have to write about the recession again. We’re tired of hearing about graduates from our fine school entering the jobless world, looking at a forecast of unemployment with a chance of hiring freeze. All this exclamation-point-punctuated madness — Economic crash! Hundreds Laid Off! Aaahh Real Monsters! — reminds us to be very, very happy that we live in a collegiate bubble, insulated from the outside world by our vehement denial of its existence and protective beer goggles. This willful ignorance of the universe beyond University City, however, can no longer go on. The Inquirer reports that a sacred Penn institution is suffering from the big bad economic crisis: The Food Cart. Featured in the article is Rami’s, a Middle Eastern food cart at 40th and Locust where for less than $4 a person can enjoy delicious falafel goodness and Sami Dakko’s charming, thick accent. Read the full story here, but only if you are prepared to find out just how tough times are for Rami’s and that Sami actually says “Hello beautiful” to everyone, not just you.
Last week, when the campers from Creative Steps Day Camp showed up to take advantage of their swim privileges at the Valley Swim Club (for which Creative Steps had paid a not-insignificant $1900), club president John Duesler was pissed. Apparently Creative Steps had neglected to give him a heads-up that the campers were black. As we read on Gawker, a camper’s parent reported that “When the minority children got in the pool all of the Caucasian children immediately exited the pool…The pool attendants came and told the black children that they did not allow minorities in the club and needed the children to leave immediately.”
John Duesler responded by suspending the Creative Steps’ membership and issuing a statement: “There was concern that a lot of kids would change the complexion … and the atmosphere of the club.”
What’s the latest story from the never-ending saga that is the circus surrounding Michael Jackson’s death? MJ’s dermatologist denies being the father of Paris, Prince Michael and Blanket… but, oh wait, now that he thinks about it, he did donate sperm that one time so it’s actually a legit possibility. While Dr. Arnold Klein vehemently insisted the topic should not be discussed on national television, he didn’t seem to have a problem expressing as much to People. Why do we even care about this? Besides the fact that the Street staff love to moonwalk (demonstrating one’s ability to moonwalk is part of the application process to be an editor, FYI), we also think you should know that Klein went to Penn undergrad AND Penn Med. Anyone have details about his time here at Penn? Let us know in the comments!
A few months ago, some bitter chick at UCLA started a Facebook group to prevent underachieving Z-lister James Franco from being the school’s commencement speaker. We don’t want to seem ungrateful; we had a great time hearing John Legend the night after we got drunk with him at Blarney, and we were entertained enough by Amy’s pomp and circumstance remarks to blog about her. However, neither our favorite Ordinary Person nor our esteemed prez quoted R.L. Stine or flew around with a jet pack, and that’s exactly what we would have enjoyed had we been treated to Franco’s words. Lucky for us, he posted highlights from his rejected speech on FunnyorDie.com! (And, lucky for you, we’ve posted the video below.)
There are all kinds of “authorities” out there claiming they have the power to determine which school is the best school in the country (or, to narrow it down to our own playing field, which Ivy League school is awesomer than all the rest). We, however, choose to only trust the source that has proven its ability to discern excellence— like one that knows how to decide who had the Best Week Ever. VH1 stepped up and hosted an Ivy League smackdown. A few proud Quakers represented our fine university on VH1′s The Great Debate and proceeded to dominate the competition, kicking the asses of Harvard, Yaleand Columbia. We declare this demonstration of excellence definitive proof that Penn is, in fact, The Best School Ever. Watch the clip below to bask in the glory:
"With these glasses, there's no way the White House won't take me seriously!"
You remember Kalpen Modi? He used to get high and satisfy his munchies at a famous fast food emporium in the Garden State, and then once the buzz faded and he got sick of playing doctor he thought, “Hey, you know what would be more fun than trying to get laid at Princeton? Teaching kids at Penn!” After a brief stint in academia, the Prof decided to trade up. He announced his plans to swap Dr. House for the White House to work with the Obama administration, where they’re makin’ change and takin’ names and throwing the occasional luau. Modi has ditched his screen name (which, what with it being “Kal PENN” and all, we really liked) for his birth name just in time for his first day on the job in Washington. Now this is all very exciting news; even though we’re unemployed, we can usually find it in our hearts to be happy for people with jobs. The only catch: Warner Brothers put out the word that we could be looking forward to A Very Harold & Kumar Christmas in November 2010, and Modi is already signed on to at least a year of service in the Obama administration. Since we’re sort of in crazy times right now — war, economic insanity, global warming, Michael Jackson’s death — it’s not like Kumar can take a few extended vacations to steal back the stoner crown from Judd Apatow. We aren’t really sure how he’s going to work this one out, but we’re thinking he’s got a cyclical career path going on. Maybe we can expect to see him back in University City?