Burger King is all about having it your way spray: the hamburger chain just debuted a line of cologne. I KID YOU NOT, PEOPLE. It’s available online and at Ricky’s NYC, for a mere $4. (Coming soon to Douglas Cosmetics? We can only hope.) I implore you to check out its sensual website, firemeetsdesire.com. The fragrance is being marketed as “the scent of seduction, with a hint of flame-broiled meat.” First Penn State perfume, now this… honestly, what’s next?!
Give us your most outrageous scent suggestions in the comments!
Things NOT to do with your Wharton degree: execute the biggest fraud ever. Like, literally, in the history of the world.
Bernie Madoff, who looks to us like a nice, old Jewish guy, has been arrested by the FBI for allegedly running a $50 million Ponzi scheme, which involves using money from new investors to pay old investors absurd dividends. For much of his career, Madoff has been perpetuating this cycle. And now–here’s the really fun part!–his sons have tipped off the SEC and FBI about Daddy Madoff’s wrongdoings.
Since UTB is a few steps ahead of, basically, everything, we figured we’d inform our loyal readers of this craziness before it showed up on every major news outlet. Here’s to consumer confidence reaching all-time lows…
Here at UTB, we’ve been suffering from a collective denial of the upcoming end of the semester. It seems that only mere days ago we were a just a fledgling baby blog, with only a handful of readers (mostly our parents).
To make matters worse, publications have started to do the usual end-of-the-year round-up of bests, worsts, mosts, etc. Blender magazine has just released its list of the top albums of 2008. After the jump, check out their list–and our comments, of course.
ARRESTED. DEVELOPMENT. MOVIE. WILL. HAPPEN. I can’t even write about this. I just cannot verbalize my excitement. Any thoughts on the cast member who’s not signed on to the big-screen adaptation? My bets are on Michael Cera.
Breaking news! People magazine has named Hugh Jackman 2008’s Sexiest Man Alive. The Australia star, who is apparently “all scruff and biceps,” beat out UTB’s personal choice (Rahm Emanuel, obvi) for the coveted title.
Who do you think should have been named the Sexiest Man Alive, or at least Sexiest Man at Penn? Tell us!
In September, while doing my routine Facebook stalking one night, I was struck by an ad that appeared on the sidebar. The ad was for something called “The Lazy Grocer”–being one of those two thing (lazy, not a grocer, in case you were unsure), I decided to click and see what was going on; ostensibly, some Penn kids decided to start a late-night FroGro delivery service. When I checked the site, it had some pretty impressive Flash graphics and not much actual content–or any delivery options. I brushed the business off as a failed Marketing/Management project and pretty much forgot about it. However, this evening I received an email informing me that the Lazy Grocer was open for business!
The Lazy Grocer offers a multitude of food and drink items, as well as party and household supplies, which include–but certainly aren’t limited to–copy paper and condoms. Also, their $2 delivery charge guarantees delivery in 30 minutes or less; pay an additional $2 and you can have it in 15 minutes or less. Not too bad! I decided to try it out, and ordered some Gushers and a few sugar-free Red Bulls, neither of which I really needed. Oh well. My shit was delivered in a little over a half an hour, but I’m not going to be nitpicky. Gushers are awesome. This is a Pennstitution on the rise, and I encourage you all to try it when you get sick of Insomnia or Ed’s Pizza.
The new CVS, located in the Radian between 39th and 40th Streets on Walnut, is finally open! No longer will off-campus-dwellers be forced to trek to 34th and Walnut to get their pharmacy fix. To be honest, I didn’t really believe that it would ever open, along the same lines as the alleged Capogiro and Steven Starr restaurants that the Radian was allegedly going to house.
Have you been to the new CVS yet? How is it? Let us know!
Like OMG, it's the Cheetah Girls! Adrienne is on the left. She is also wearing clothes.
Okay, this was clearly bound to happen. Cheetah Girl Adrienne Bailon is dating Kim Kardashian’s brother Rob, and it’s pretty clear that fame-whoring, and whoring in general, run in that family. Pictures of Bailon–which were, of course, ostensibly intended for Rob’s eyes only–have just hit the Internet.
Can’t wait to see what Disney has to say about this one. Vanessa Hudgen’s pics were MUCH worse, and she got a slap on the wrist and two more movie contracts.
This is a six-inch Prada creation. Look comfortable to you?
I’m known among friends for being particularly well-heeled–I have a penchant for the teetering, towering works of Christian Louboutin, Manolo Blahnik, Giuseppe Zanotti and many, many others. But my boys are testing me.
Manolo Blahnik, who has traditionally topped off his heel height at a (still respectable) five inches, decided to up the ante to six inches for Fall/Winter ‘08. With no platforms. For you male readers, allow me to clarify–platforms on the heels elevate their soles, thereby making them less painful. For a taste of the platform-free, stand on your toes until you’re at a forty-five degree angle, and then stay like that. All night. Sir Blahnik (Yes, he has been knighted. His shoes are that hot.) says that his six-inch creations have accounted for 30% of his sales this season. Pretty impressive, dude.
Now, I have long dealt with six-inch platform heels–a challenge I undertook after watching too much Sex and the City, most likely. But Louboutin has just announced that he plans to release EIGHT-INCH HEELS next fall. Not only would these babies make me nearly six feet tall, but I’m fairly certain they’re also going to make me fall flat on my fucking face. Is this how we’ve decided to cope with the failing economy? By abusing our feet? Masochism just isn’t my cup of tea.
As if the original Crocs–and the mock-Ugg Crocs–weren’t bad enough, Crocs has recently debuted its new fall/winter “collection” of their YOU by Crocs line. I wish I were making this shit up.
These are called the Twisted Tart. I don't even know where to begin.
Aside from the use of all caps in the title of the line, which makes me feel as though Soulja Boy is imploring me to buy the shoes…. these babies are u-g-l-y. No alibis. It’s great that Crocs is trying to offer “comfortable, ergonomic, odor-resistant, anti-microbial, lightweight” shoes… but there has clearly been an aesthetic compromise that I just can’t tolerate. The attempt to copy these Prada beauties physically pains me. While I am all for recessionista fashion finds, the shoes pictured are $150! Surely Steve Madden makes something similar, cheaper, and not so damn ugly.
If you’ve been on Facebook anytime in the last few days–which, let’s be real, you have… many times–you’ve likely been bombarded with invitations to Halloween parties galore. Consider UTB your friendly social planner; we’ve compiled all of these Facebook invites for you! Deciding where to go, however, is entirely up to you. Same goes for costumes.
1. Sigma Chi’s Techno Halloween: Interesting… a Sigma Chi party with a Zete twist.
Ahead of the trend in, well, everything, UTB is happy to provide you with a link to stream two songs from Kanye’s upcoming album, 808s and Heartbreak, which drops November 25. Still not sure how you’re feeling about Kanye lately? Now you can decide. Enjoy!
Breaking news! People magazine has named Hugh Jackman 2008’s 
In September, while doing my routine Facebook stalking one night, I was struck by an ad that appeared on the sidebar. The ad was for something called
