FeaturesApril 15, 2014 at 3:29 pm

Your Fling Photos Are In: Reliving Spring Fling 2K14

flingstanleyAs we collectively wallow in this rainy post-Fling Tuesday, we can only hope ya didn’t have to untag too many pictures or explain to your parents why they received a Dominos pizza delivery at 2am on Saturday (It’s a long not even a long story).

Either way, this moody weather gives us the perfect excuse to reflect on what transpired this past weekend, and there’s no better medium to do this than through the contemporary photograph. Without further ado about nothing, here’s our roundup of the Fling photos you sent us, or hashtagged with #flingstagram:





Nothing unites strangers like the 3am drive for calories. Here we observe an eclectic medley of organisms gathering around the oasis that is ol’ McDonald’s.



Read the rest of this entry »

Chasing AmyApril 15, 2014 at 9:47 am

Chasing Amy: Philly’s CoverGirl

Yaaaaas A-Gut yaaaaas. Take a moment out of your Tuesday to adoringly gaze at Philadelphia magazine’s April 2014 cover girl, Madame President herself. The publication’s “POWER.” issue features its 75 Most Influential, and look who’s front and center! Not that we even noticed the men flanking her with her blonde locks gloriously gleaming. Justice has been served, PhillyMag – but don’t think we’ve forgotten all your past faux pas.

What's HapPENNingApril 14, 2014 at 11:12 am

What’s HapPENNing?

whats happeningAhh, the sweet smells of Spring and sobriety.

This week has a ton of events that will serve as the perfect cure to your hangovers and matzah-induced stomach-aches.

Ongoing: Spring Green Week: Blind taste tests of organic food, clothing swaps in the Quad, and Quizzo — all with an environmental twist.


PASSOVER!!! Make your grandmother happy and go to the 30 minute seder. Also, I^ am hosting a seder at my house. Shoot me a message if you want to come.


If you haven’t yet overdose on SPEC, join them for an advanced screening of some movie with a topless Zac Efron: “Neighbors” @ 7:30pm @ the Rave


Wharton grad-turned VC dude-turned PA’s maybe future governor: Rob McCord @ 7pm @ JMHH265


Do you like Rabbits? Do you like Holes? Go see Rabbit Hole, presented by the Front Row Theater Company: @ 7:30pm @ Class of ’49 (Houston Hall)


Sororities + Sumo = Alzheimers? We’re confused, too, but it seems like Sammy’s philanthropy event will be a blast! @ 2pm @ 40th and Locust

This week’s award for best event cover photo goes to Onda Latina, performing “The Syndicate.” @ 6pm @ Iron Gate Theater

Off the Beat swears they’ll perform Jason Mraz, and we swear we won’t miss it! @ 6:30pm @ Harrison Auditorium (Penn Museum)

Kudos to EXCELANO for accepting Venmo payments for their show this semester! @ 8pm @ Dunlop (for details on where this place is, check out the event here)

Chasing AmyApril 8, 2014 at 2:04 pm

Chasing Amy: Locust Runway

photo (1)

It’s warm out! It’s iced coffee season! You’re not the only one taking advantage of the warm weather. Madame President was spotted strutting down Locust today looking fierce as ever. While simultaneously juggling Quaker Days and parents’ meetings–and just generally running the world–A-Gut looks cool, calm, and collected chatting with a pal as if it’s totally casual for her to walk among us peasants. University Presidents…they’re just like us! Except that she was probably off to somewhere really important, while you were sitting, pretending to work but really trying to beat 2048. It’s okay, because so were we.

FeaturesApril 8, 2014 at 11:28 am

Quaker Days: Who Needs Hosts When All Penn Is Your Home

BkUY-jrCEAAF83hDean Furda, we feel your pain. Who wouldn’t think it would be incredibly easy to find housing for over 1,000 pimply pre-frosh the week before fling?

Even though it might seem like no one was listening as you pleaded for more males to host males, we were, and we have some advice. So if your hosting drive doesn’t pan out, here are some alternative suggestions for Quaker Days sleeping locations that will truly give these kids a taste of what Penn is all about.

1) Under the button: Now, we might be biased, but what better way to welcome in the new baby Quakes than with an inauguration into one of Penn’s most famed campus traditions? Give them that experience the brochures just don’t completely capture.

We Have Plenty More

Penn MadnessApril 7, 2014 at 12:30 pm

Congratulations To Our Penn 2048 Winners

Screen Shot 2014-04-06 at 12.29.56 AMThey played our version of 2048, and they played it well. Their prize, as we’re sure they expected, is the immortalization of their names on the internet! (We’re a blog; we have no budget.)

Give a rousing round of web-plause to….

Alexander Elias!!!!
Ahmed Mohieldin!!!!
Gautam Narasimhan!!!!
Jenny Lu!!!!

Get these names tattooed on your body! These folks are going places!

What's HapPENNingApril 7, 2014 at 11:39 am

What’s HapPENNing?

whats happeningHELLO, FLING WEEK. It’s the calm before the shitstorm of beer and bad decisions that will descend upon us in 72 hours, or 48 for fun people. Unfortunately, a few things still have to happen before you can find your peacelovenfling. But this is Penn! The only thing we like more than BYOing is finding events to inappropriately BYO. So happy flasking:

Today, 2-5pm: College Palooza
Head over to Houston for some trifold poster board presentations, FUN instagram contests, and liquid nitrogen ice cream. What happens if you mix liquid nitrogen and alc?

Today, 6:30-7:30pm: AEI Presents “What You Need to Know About the Economy You Will Be Entering”
Concerned that you’re not worrying about your future quite enough? Head to 4th floor College Hall. Read the rest of this entry »

FeaturesApril 4, 2014 at 8:52 am

Flyerer of the Week: Chi Olympics

Chi Olympics

If there’s one word that comes to mind when you think of Penn, it’s sports. And charity. And donuts. Well, maybe not. But if you’re looking for a sweet combination of these three, then be sure to head out to Chi Olympics, this Saturday from 2-4 PM . For this week’s Flyerer of the Week, we learned about what it takes to be the best.

What is Chi Olympics? 
It’s Chi O’s annual fundraiser for Make-A-Wish Foundation. It’s a really fun tournament with sports and games and great prizes for everybody!

So if it’s a competition, how athletic do you have to be?
Actually, not at all. There’s a donut-eating contest, so no athleticism required.

So why should we come to this event as opposed to the other billions of things happening this week?
Because it supports an awesome organization! Make- A-Wish Foundation does great things for kids. Also, anyone who participates will have a lot of fun and can win prizes. We have gift cards for everywhere. Literally, everywhere.

Where, specifically?
We have Kiwi and Smokes! What college kid doesn’t like some beer with a side of froyo?

If you could describe this event in three words, what would it be?
“Fresh”, “once-in-a-lifetime-experience”, and “cash-swag-money” .

Speaking of cash-swag-money, what would happen if Amy G showed up to the event?
We would recruit her for our team. There would also be lots of selfies going on. She’d be a really good competitor for the relay race or something but probably bad at the donut-eating contest. If she wanted, she could be the Grand Torch Bearer who lights the fire of Chi Olympics. The physical and metaphorical fire, that is.

Great! Any last words?
I’d rather be roller-skating right now. I’m not lying….wait, don’t put that!

Penn MadnessApril 2, 2014 at 10:00 am

PENN MADNESS: And The Winner Is…

PENNMADNESSWINNER.APR2After an unexpected surge in the final 24 hours of polling–and we should note that the voting was very nearly 50/50–we’d like to extend our sincere congratulations to…#THEOSTHEOSTHEOS!

Alas, Theos: were it not for your inability to switch a Google setting from “public” to “private,” nor for your blatant sexual objectification, that serendipitous, once-in-a-lifetime, holy-shit-this-seems-too-good-to-be-true miracle that was classes getting cancelled at 2 p.m. may have stolen the honor. Hopefully, such a title will give you that extra push to finally, “get [those] bitches to anchor down in your new, chill pad.” 

As a token of our gratitude, both to Theos and to all those who played along this past week, we put our own spin on campus’ newest computer game addiction. And since we’re feeling especially generous of late, the first person to screenshot the winner and send it over to tips@underthebutton.com will receive a special prize (a Theos Fling tank, anyone?). Until next year, folks!

FeaturesMarch 31, 2014 at 12:33 pm

The 28 Best Quotes From “FPC Hearing: Much Ado About Paper”


No, free US from this RIDICULOUS NONSENSE of a “hearing.”

Oh wait, this wasn’t a performing arts group’s spring performance of UA Elections: I Promise I Didn’t Pay For Facebook Likes? With all that’s going on this week, you could’ve had us fooled. For three-plus hours we were glued to our computer screens watching the hilarious circus that was the “trial” for Gabe Delaney and Julie Bittar, who were accused of withholding monetary records related to their campaign. So, follow along as we recap the most memorable, Emmy-worthy quotes of the latest episode of House of Cards hearing.

  • “This is an orderly process governed by rules. Please respect that…This is not a spectacle for your entertainment.” Oh yes, yes it is (and it was).
  • “I’m filing a complaint against Gabe Delaney and Julie Bittar for…I think…violation.” Our sentiments exactly. Read the rest of this entry »