Wake up! It’s Thursday! You only have one day left to clear your room of roaches and squatters before mom and dad are a–knocking! Luckily, Street’s in your Daily Pennsylvanian.

Food’s got your obligatory Family Weekend dinner reservation covered. Why not try Vetri, the swanky downtown eatery and subject of this week’s feature? Ego helps you field those questions about roaches and squatters. Arts takes the whole fam on a lovely First Friday excursion.

Highbrow’s got your gossip (with a special dose of birth control!), Film reviews “Liberal Arts” (not like your college experience), Music spends some time at Pilam (where else?) And Lowbrow gives the finger to everyone, especially you, GROWN UPS!

Writer’s meeting tonight! 6:30 pm. 4015 Walnut. The newest member of Street (BESIDES YOU!) will make her debut…

You must present valid identification before proceeding with this post. JK! This is no voter booth. Read more about the voter ID law, and Penn students’ reactions to it in this week’s Street.

We’re also interviewing such luminosities as Penn alumn Elizabeth Banks, ICA director Amy Sadao, and Ego of the Week Tanvir Gopal.  And in case you’re keeping tabs, Lowbrow has a handy guide to social climbing.

Music looks into DIY venues. Food explores the luxuuuuurious world of truffles. Highbrow’s got your weekly fill of gossip (key words for this week: ghost. Glory hole. Cardiac arrest.)

Happy reading! And don’t forget to come to the writer’s meeting tonight at 6:30 at 4015 Walnut. We won’t card you at the door.

We know you’re feeling :( because there’s no Street this week, but cheer up, kid. We’ve got something arguably better than Shoutouts after break- yup, Spring Break Texts From Last Night! Now you can let the world know how jealous you are everyone on your hall is going to Puerto Vallarta or that idiot in your writing seminar is going to Europe while you’re stuck at home. The best ones will go in print in our March 15th publication. Snazzy, eh?

Submit your Spring Break texts to us before midnight on March 12th. Sound good? Good. And have a wonderful break or whatever.

Highbrow Besos!

Still alive? Congrats! Looks like you’ve survived snowpocalypse 2k12. Pat yourself on the back with this week’s Street.

Street‘s all about the romance this week. Film’s got some helpful suggestions of where to take your slam piece after a movie. Food & Drink plays (and wins) matchmaker. And Arts keeps it classy as always, with an adorable DIY bookmark perfect for your paperback erotica.

But if you’re more the type who wants to punch those heart-shaped balloons every time you walk by CVS, Feature has an escape route to West Philly.

Ego’s got the girls behind the vagina costumes. Music has some advice for all you sucka frat DJs. Lowbrow’s got the 411 on how to get out of hazing (shoutout to the UA! holla!) And, as always, Highbrow brings you the gossip, where the special musical guest this week is Kweder.

Writer’s meeting tonight! We want you. 4015 Walnut. 6:30.

So who is that mysterious silhouetted figure on the cover? We’ll never tell, but we will present you with a thoughtfully-researched piece of long-form journalism that asks some serious questions about last semester’s Occupy rager. Check it out.

In other news, Highbrow lets you in on a few pledging secrets this week. A concise preview: chain-smoking, Jewish junk and a sorority’s new style that’s reminiscent of Mugatu’sDerelicte collection.

For those of you who are looking to get into Center City, Arts has a delightful afternoon in store for you, and Music gently guides you into the world of Philly record stores (and even gives you a primer on vinyl). For those of you who tend to stay inside and watch movies, check out Film’s debate over the future of 3D movies.

And don’t forget Lowbrow’s exposé on the scandalous pasts of Penn’s most well-known faces. We now understand why Eric Furda can get so catty sometimes.

It’s a new year. It’s a new Street.

Highbrow is wading in your dirty, stinking rush stories. Did you make the cut?

If you had a chance between all the boot-licking and lobby-vomiting to do some last-minute course searching, you owe Ego of the Week and Penn Course Review Editor-in-Chief Michael Roberts a big “Thanks!” balloon for keeping it klassy.

Food & Drink is frankly a little concerned for your health. And that’s why they want you to eat breakfast. Feature’s got your mental well-being in mind. Why not take a trip to one of our curated spots in Philly?

Music is looking into the future. Film is singing John Goodman’s praises. Arts planned out your Saturday and it involves billboards and burritos. And of course, Lowbrow’s got teh zingers on teh rush.

And don’t forget our Writers’ Meeting tonight! 6:30. 4015 Walnut. Love you missed you can’t wait to see you!!!

This week marks the end of an era. The birth of a butterfly. The death of a caterpillar. Or something like that. Whatever.

It’s time for SHOUTOUTS. So eat ‘em up. Yeah.

While you’re at it, check out Ego of the Week Zack Rosen and his shadow Shaam. Food & Drink gets you through those stress eating days ahead with some healthy options. Film breaks our movie habits down by the numbers.

Music chats up student bands about SPEC’s Penn Collective show tonight. Hint: there’s one cool chick among these hot d00dz. Arts brings you the best of First Friday.

Don’t miss out on our feature: an in-depth look at Penn’s very own 2003 sex scandal. Sound familiar?