As Rebecca Stein once said, there is no such thing as a free lunch—just as there is no such thing as a truly waived tuition. However, from what we hear from the most secretive of sources, certain events organically originate as orgies, while others are forcibly filmed for the furious art–fucks of Filmadelphia.
In other news, some of our sections decided to stray Off the Beat(en) path and took a hike towards a healthier, fitter life. We can’t guarantee the advice is too great though. Still, if you’re just looking for a walk, stroll down the flavorlicious Fishtown in Street’s newly reinvented Flavorhoods, ’cause it’s always a beautiful day to be a neighbor (won’t you be ours?) Tired of old jingles like that? Then get a jump on campus’ shittiest music, from Saxby’s to Saigon and beyond. Tired off all the shittiness? Then get some culture at PIFA. It’s pifftastic.
Lights. Camera. Tuck in your dick and get ready for some action, because this issue is twice as fabulous as anything you’ve ever seen in print.
34th Street is taking us into the flashy yet sophisticated Philadelphia drag scene, where “reading” means far more than diving into your Biology textbook.
You’ve got questions about what to do when your partner wants to enter the “back door,” and Miss Cassandra’s got answers. Once you’ve checked that off your bucket list, Ego has some more questionable things for you to do before locking yourself in Van Pelt during finals week.
We’re getting ahead of ourselves–there are still a few great weeks left in the semester. Music’s got a list of Penn alums in bands that should definitely be added to your party, workout and study playlists. Plus, Food and Drink’s got some great snacks for you to enjoy outside (once the weather pushes past 50 degrees…) while you listen. If going outside isn’t your thing, Arts has the lowdown on some antique stores you can visit in Center City—by just walking in, you’ll feel much better about the current state of your bedroom.
Course registration has begun, which means we’re all worrying we won’t graduate because there is no way to satisfy those annoying sector requirements. Never fear, Lowbrow’s got your back. Once you’ve got your schedule figured out, Film’s workplace movie playlist will serve as your orientation before you start that sweet (or not–so–sweet) summer internship.
Spring break might feel too short, and that’s because it definitely is. There’re gonna be a lot of emotions in a short timespan so here’s your guide to what most of us will be feeling, and how to deal.
You’re imagining what you’d be doing if you had classes today. Sleep until you’re not nocturnal anymore. Put thoughts of homework to bed too.
Time to put higher education completely out of your mind. Spring break is here; you deserve this, girl! If you’re sticking around, there are still shenanigans to be had.
You’re deep enough into spring break and far enough from the end to let it all loose. Live a little and, while you’re at it, don’t forget to send Street your crazy SB texts.
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Seems like things have been getting frisky in the M&T office, according to this email, recently sent by an administrator for the Jerome Fisher Program in Management and Technology.
Although the nature of the “inappropriate behavior” wasn’t specified, we think it may have had something to do with a senior’s recent answer to a Street survey. Weirdest place one guy ever hooked up? “M&T office. Free printing AND a blowjob.” The stress must be getting to you. Next time, though, we suggest you take it somewhere more private (Van Pelt stacks anyone?)
Love. Dystopia. Corn being like sex. Welcome to the world of fact (or fiction), as Street brings you its Annual Fiction Issue.
This week, Highbrow welcomes the return of the LocustLexicon, providing you with acronyms that are perfect ad libs when you’re SALFing from the SNAG that you slept with last weekend. Wow, TWA. Ego decides to tackle another important (yet we still have classes?) calendar day and center everything on our favorite Prez, A-Gutt. Not really. Instead, we’re having a palooza to celebrate the dear past heads of our country. Puck Frinceton. And Woodrow Wilson. Arts gets all dreamy with Shepard Fairey. Read the rest of this entry »
Ravens fans, 49ers fans and the sports–impaired alike: the Super Bowl is over and you can stop hating one another (or pretending to give a shit) and reunite over a common love: everybody’s favorite Thursday publication. That’s 34th Street, y’all, and get excited because this week’s issue is an [insert sports metaphor of your choice].
This week’s feature examines the role of politics in the classroom and what it’s like to be a college republican in a liberal arts world. Music gives you something to talk about besides Beyonce’s half–time performance with a double–profile of artists Xaphoon Jones and BADBADNOTGOOD. We promise that it’s goodgoodnotbad. Highbrow gives you badasses out there a taste of what it’s like to steal from frat parties, while Lowbrow pleases your parents by giving you helpful hints on tackling (haha, sports…get it?) OCR.
And just in case you’re wondering who Amy G’s doppleganger is, check out Film this week. Bonus: two faculty members share a striking resemblance to the Muppets. Arts showcases the Counterparts’ Joey Wallerstein, and Bhargavi Ammu might be our cutest Ego ever. If all of our awesome features have you salivating from excitement, stop by Four Worlds Bakery, featured this week in Food and Drink, for some topnotch treats.
‘Tis the season for merriment and joy, with Christmas in just a little over a month! But, in case you forgot, the world is actually supposed to end four days before that! Luckily, some new signs all along Locust are reminding us that ‘tis the season to be jolly because Tis Not the End.
As it turns out, the cryptic TisNotTheEnd.com is the brainchild of the Penn Museum, which is cleverly advertising its new Maya 2012 exhibit (ohhhh). The museum is getting on Penn’s level with oh-so-accessible signage, such as the one pictured. There’s also what we presume to be a 34th Street shoutout (one week left to submit those!), with one sign noting that if reading Highbrow is the most highbrow thing you’ve done all semester, “Tis not the end of the world.” The exhibit is FREE for Penn students and runs through the end of the calendar year (which will happen).
Guten tag! It’s Thursday, which means the official start of Octo–13–er fest! And Street’s out.
Chuggachugga. Choo Choo. It’s the Reading Railroad. It’s a jungle up (and down) there. Catch it in all it’s un–gentrified glory while you still can! And read about it in this week’s feature.
Ego talks to a gentle giant who can spot that fake ID from a mile away. Music talks to Mayer Hawthorne (and he’s super excited to be here, guys!) and film talks to Paul Blart himself, Kevin James.
Highbrow’s got some Penn-centric “Missed Connections“. Food puts HarBar on the chopping block. Arts has the rundown on Design Philly. Lowbrow does nothing. Their parents do something though.
Writer’s meeting tonight! Papa Bear, we’re looking at you. 6:30. 4015 Walnut.
Wake up! It’s Thursday! You only have one day left to clear your room of roaches and squatters before mom and dad are a–knocking! Luckily, Street’s in your Daily Pennsylvanian.
Food’s got your obligatory Family Weekend dinner reservation covered. Why not try Vetri, the swanky downtown eatery and subject of this week’s feature? Ego helps you field those questions about roaches and squatters. Arts takes the whole fam on a lovely First Friday excursion.
Highbrow’s got your gossip (with a special dose of birth control!), Film reviews “Liberal Arts” (not like your college experience), Music spends some time at Pilam (where else?) And Lowbrow gives the finger to everyone, especially you, GROWN UPS!
Writer’s meeting tonight! 6:30 pm. 4015 Walnut. The newest member of Street (BESIDES YOU!) will make her debut…
You must present valid identification before proceeding with this post. JK! This is no voter booth. Read more about the voter ID law, and Penn students’ reactions to it in this week’s Street.
We’re also interviewing such luminosities as Penn alumn Elizabeth Banks, ICA director Amy Sadao, and Ego of the Week Tanvir Gopal. And in case you’re keeping tabs, Lowbrow has a handy guide to social climbing.
Music looks into DIY venues. Food explores the luxuuuuurious world of truffles. Highbrow’s got your weekly fill of gossip (key words for this week: ghost. Glory hole. Cardiac arrest.)
Happy reading! And don’t forget to come to the writer’s meeting tonight at 6:30 at 4015 Walnut. We won’t card you at the door.