It’s that awkward limbo time between Fling and finals. Might as well not spend it comatose/destitute/in VP!
Love Is Not Blind
Who? Penn Chinese Theater
Where and When? Tonight at 7:30 at Ibrahim Theater in International House
Why? It’s their first ever show, so go out and support the new group. It definitely sounds dramatic.
The Made in America music festival is making its second annual appearance this Labor Day weekend. The lineup was just announced today, and we have one word for you: BEYONCÉ. So there you go, kids. If you’re still bitter about Girl Talk by August, you can bow down to the mother of all Fling headliners we never had.
Also, in case you haven’t noticed the academic calendar, school starts a week earlier this year (booooo). That means once you’re done reuniting with the besties and intimidating the freshmen, you can do NSO all over again the next weekend! Thanks, Jay-Z.
Some Penn students are super stoked that Tyga found time out of his busy schedule of slappin’ hoes and gettin’ faded to make our sweaty frat basement dreams a reality. From the ensuing Facebook group, flyer campaign, and multiple editorials, it’s no secret that others aren’t so stoked.
If you were planning on hitting up the Quad moonbounce and then actually bouncing for another school’s spring concert, don’t hit up your friends at Harvard. Tyga is set to headline their annual Yardfest AKA fake fling AKA nice try but still lame. In light of his violent and objectifying lyrics, the Crimsons are crimson (too easy) with rage and have started their own protests.
The reactions at Harvard are just as mixed. “As if these kids aren’t the same ones drinking to ‘Faded’ every weekend,” one comment notes. No comment?
A newly formed group called Penn Timebank has a cool way of incentivizing you to help someone out. The idea is simple: it acts as an alternative currency where you give time to get time. So every hour you volunteer, you earn an hour of someone else’s time in the network.
Penn Timebank was recently granted $1,000 by Kelly Writer’s House and is hosting “an exchange afternoon” this Saturday. Drop by to learn how to make mochi and dumplings, dance, play guitar or ukelele, and more. You might just have a shot at being the next ukulele sensation after this guy (which is just as likely as you still having a perfect bracket).
After the first week of freshman year, the omg-I-go-to-a-school-where-nobel-laureates-hang-with-students-on-Tuesday-nights reaction kind of wears off. Vice President Biden speaking at commencement? Old news. Zach Braff coming on the 25th? Casual. So we don’t even blame you that much for being all, “Who’s that?” when you hear that Demetri Martin is Penning it up next week.
Who is Demetri Martin anyway? He’s written for Conan O’Brien, had his own Comedy Central show, had his own segment on The Daily Show, starred in a Fountains of Wayne video (not that one, unfortunately), and run around naked in a movie about Woodstock. Scratch that—we do kind of blame you. He’s kind of a big deal. We even sort of forgive him for going to Yale.
Desperate to impress that special someone this V-Day? Girlfriend/boyfriend/hall-cest-mate disappointed with your lackluster performance in bed? Check out Moregasm, presented by SPEC, Wharton Alliance, PCUW and the Penn Women’s Center to benefit the Vagina Monologues, tonight at 7 p.m. in the Harrison Sky Lounge.
Professional Sexuality Educators Avital and Laura of NYC’s illustrious female-friendly sex toy shop, Babeland, are hosting a workshop on the anatomy of pleasure. All genders, sexual orientations, and slightly disturbing fetishes are welcome. Go. Take a friend. Have a good time.
This Friday, Mask and Wig is putting on its 15th annual ComFest, an intercollegiate comedy festival. This year’s show will be hosted by celebrity guest Greg Proops, known for his appearances on Whose Line Is It Anyway? and Chelsea Lately. Sketch groups from universities like NYU and Tufts received special invitations to perform as well, and from their glowing descriptions on the ComFest website, we get the impression that Mask and Wig is basically the Regina George of the college comedy world. You really can’t help but love them.
When you see Mask and Wig on Locust this week, it might be worth it to take out your security earbuds. Stop staring at your shoes. Wipe off the flyer-proof bitch face and buy a ticket to this hilarious event that sounds like, but isn’t, a collegiate Comic-Con.
If you want to stay in the loop this summer no matter where you are, Facebook events and other resources are a great way to stay connected. Here’s our list of links to help you avoid missing out in your city.
This is by no means complete— share your own with us in the comments!
Philly
Penn Summer In Philadelphia
Seniors In Philadelphia
Visit Philly’s Summer Events
Without further ado, we present to you some really deep poetry that’s also a social calendar.
Beta does Wale
Oz and Tabard at Recess
EuroPenn and dates.
Water bottles. Towne.
Castle, Palmer, or Fiso?
Late nights all around.
It’s Friday, Friday
Gotta get down on Friday
We so excited.
Latin barbecue.
Shows are all up in the Quad.
Theos “hosts” Dayglow.
The celebration of no jobs this summer liberal arts is here! Tomorrow the College Dean’s Advisory Board will be hosting its annual College Palooza (wait, like a play on Lollapalooza? Nice, DAB) from 11 a.m. – 3 p.m. on College Green complete with “giveaways, fun, lectures, and performances.” We’re not really sure what this “fun” will entail, but rumor has it a certain cupcake truck is planning to show up. Plus, if the event is anywhere near as cool as the logo, it will definitely be worth checking out.
