
shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
If you’re like us, and your summer has been embarrassingly lacking in fairies and donkey costumes, you might want to get your fix in Clark Park this week watching Shakespeare in Clark Park’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream. This is the 5th year this merry band of thespians have been doing their thing in the bowl of the park, and the best part is, you don’t have to shell out any mo’ ducats than you want to (meaning: aside from optional donations, this event is FREE)!
Sadly, we missed opening night yesterday, but you still have four more chances to catch a performance! Mosey on down to 43rd & Baltimore at 7pm any night this week, through Sunday, August 1. We hear this thing can get pretty crowded, though, so you might want to get there early to get a good view! We suggest you bring champagne and your best opera glasses and act like you’re at the theatahh. Or, you know, a blanket and picnic basket will probably do just fine.

Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros
Last weekend was WXPN’s XPoNential Music Festival on the Camden Waterfront! And since UTB and XPN share a love for Penn, puns, and being awesome, they asked is if we wanted to come pop by on Sunday and catch all the blogworthy action.
The festival was a big success, with great bands like Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros, Robert Randolph & the Family Band, Dawes, Fool’s Gold and Philly’s own Dr. Dog, who made references to Baltimore Avenue and 2nd Mile in his songs. Amidst all the frolicking between stages and yummy food stands, we sat down to talk to a few of the members of Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros before they went onstage. Check out our interview after the jump!
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Beer bear?
This Saturday you can drink beer and watch a bunch of animals doing cute things at the same time! Okay, yes, this is what we do most nights, but this time we’re not talking about watching sleepy kittens on YouTube. It’s the Philadelphia Zoo Summer Ale Festival!
The event is going to have beer from nineteen different breweries, plus a bunch of local food and a chance to kick back and hang out with the animals. You can also learn lots of eco-friendly tips and tricks as well as support the zoo’s Creatures of Habit initiative, so we’re sure the animals will be extra cute to say thank you. Did we mention the lifesize LEGO animals??? Buy your tickets here!

And So Can You!
And now for more proof that Wawa is God’s gift to college students (or at the very least run by the Keebler elves or something): the mile-long hoagie. Actually, it’s a mile and a quarter, and it’s being built today by the Philadelphia Art Museum to be shared among Philadelphians young and old. Nice try, Subway footlong.
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The days are still getting longer, and the official First Day of Summer is just a couple days away! Whatever pagan solstice parties you have planned for this weekend, there’s hardly a better place to get started on your flower crowns than Clark Park’s annual Arts & Music Festival this Saturday.
The Festival will celebrate the longest day of the year as well as Clark Park’s 40th anniversary with over 40 local artisans selling their wares, 10 local bands and even a couple dance and theater acts. There will be plenty of food and plenty of merriment to be had, carrying on from noon until sundown–which, of course, is the latest it will be all year.
Philadelphia is apparently “America’s Best Beer-Drinking City.” Though this makes us wonder about the criteria, as well as what America’s Worst Beer-Drinking City is, Philly will live up to its potentially arbitrary name from June 4-13 with the annual Philly Beer Week. This event, the largest of its kind, will celebrate beer culture with all sorts of revelry across the city, ranging from free tastings of local brews to prix-fixe menus of the classic beer-food combination to community-friendly outdoor parties and festivities.
There’s so much going on, in fact, that you might find yourself a bit overwhelmed trying to figure out what beer-centric activities are right for you. But fret not! You can manage it all with the wonders of technology and “My Philly Beer Week,” a fun organizational tool that helps you itemize and prioritize all the ways for you to drink beer.
And if you’ve already started drinking and even this seems to be too complicated, we’re here to take care of you – find a list of all the Beer Week events in West Philly after the jump.
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Summer’s here, kids, which for us Philadelphians means achieving that balance of complaining about the humidity while still finding any excuse to go outside. Usually the best way to lure us out of the AC is something involving food, be it backyard BBQs, water ice, or that creepy irritating charming little tune of the ice cream truck that will remain in our head for days afterward.
But another fun way to get food and be outside at the same time is through the classic setup of the farmers’ market! You may be familiar with some of the current ones, like the weekly Clark Park market (Clarket? Parket? Clark Park Mark?), but now everybody’s favorite summer sublet hotspot is jumping on the ol’ hay wagon and taking it for a spin around what is apparently called the “Radian plaza.”
According to the DP, there’s even going to be live music at these weekly events, from performers such as the West Philadelphia Orchestra and Unidos da Filadelfia, so feel free to brush up on your samba skills before stopping by to peruse all the yummy treats from local vendors. The farmers’ market starts on June 4 and will continue every Friday through July from noon until 2pm, so be sure to stop by and let us know what you think!
With all this talent and excitement at Penn, it can be easy to get lost in the flood of campus events. Well, the DP has got your back. This weekend our friends at the DP launched Events@Penn. We’re liking what we see so far. While it might be a little premature to dub itself the “definitive listing of events happening in the University of Pennsylvania community,” the site has some handy features–including the ability to RSVP to events and export them to your Google calendar.
So, brave/annoying/disheartened souls flyer-ing on Locust Walk, consider posting your event. We hear the internet is a great way to reach people and with your help maybe one day Events@Penn can claim its “definitive” title.

Stop by Houston Hall (Wynn Commons) from 11:00 a.m. (a little bit before right now) to 3 p.m. for SPEC Special Event’s Annual Winterfest. Hub Bub is handing out free coffee and hot chocolate, there’s a synthetic ice skating rink with skates available to rent (we’ve received word from a Street ed on the ground that it “looks dumb”), and s’mores.
This is the perfect opportunity to impress the girl of your dreams by landing a triple axle and then roasting her the perfect golden-brown marshmallow, so stop by. And wear a flame retardant leotard so that you can go from rink to fire with limited wardrobe interference.
Photos from the event after the jump.
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UPDATE: The event has been moved to the Women’s Center at 37th and Locust.
Come to the Compass (37th and Locust) tonight at 7:30 to take a stand against sexual violence. The speak out is being held by Penn Consortium of Undergraduate Women (PCUW) and One-in-Four, in response to the third reported case of sexual assault on campus this year (more information available on thedp.com).
PCUW writes:
We feel that, given the frequency of reports of sexual assault on campus this semester, and in the spirit of those that have not been and will not be reported, it is necessary for Penn students to continue to formally denounce sexual violence. Campus leaders, administrators, and other affiliates will address on-campus sexual violence — by educating our community on its prevalence, disseminating information needed in the event of sexual assault, and advocating on behalf of survivors of sexual violence. We hope to encourage open discussion and create a community that condemns all acts of sexual violence.
The event is last minute, so you can help by spreading the word, and by stopping by tonight to show your support.

Cheesesteaks' far superior, vegetarian-friendly Philly cousin.
Some people bike for affordable housing. Some people bike for mad street cred in France. And some people bike for getting places, we guess. But forget all of them; there are those who bike for a way worthier cause, and that cause is pretzels. Soft innards, a crispy shell, and salt the size of those crystals they throw on the street when it snows? Pretzels are so totally twisted. Literally!
In honor of the feature in tomorrow’s issue of 34th Street, which follows these valiant riders on a weekly pretzel mission, we present to you after the jump our top three Philly pretzel palaces that bring Philly its twisty, salty, fame. Get on your fixed gear and tell these pretzel princes to throw it in the (paper) bag.
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If you’ve been to the Perelman Quad around lunchtime any day this week, you may have noticed the sound of Winnie the Pooh being read aloud. Chances are, you let it go without a second thought. It’s not like it’s so bizarre to hear the faint mumblings of A.A. Milne every now and again, right guys? Well this time, there is actually an explanation.
The DP reports:
Starting [Sept 28], ACLU is honoring the American Library Association’s Banned Books Week by reading banned books aloud in Wynn Commons. Between the hours of 11 a.m. and 2 p.m. every day until Friday, group members will recites passages from books ranging from Kenneth Grahame’s Wind in the Willows to Harper Lee’s To Kill a Mockingbird.
Today is your last chance to check it out. We stopped by on Wednesday and found an unmanned table, so let us know what happens. Otherwise we’ll think the event got banned.

Penn thinks pink. Amy thinks, "Oh god, what do I do with my hands?"
We’ll be the first to admit that we’re sometimes a little hard on Wharton. And we’ll probably be around the…oh 23rd or 24th to admit that some of the claims we have made or supported are not 100% deserved, 100% of the time. The suggestion that business students are severely lacking in the “soul” department, for example, has us feeling a little bad today. But that’s just because Wharton Women (in conjunction with a ton of Penn student groups) is bringing together these three things:
1. Cupcakes
2. The Color Pink
3. A Good Cause
It’s like a recipe for a smile! The initiative, called Penn Thinks Pink, is an effort to raise awareness of breast cancer along with $5,000 for the Susan G. Komen Foundation. To help achieve these goals, the illustrious cupcake truck will be returning to campus from 12-2 in support of the event. Get there before they sell out (That means exactly at noon. YESTERDAY). Later, at 6:30 in Huntsman, Komen Foundation President and CEO Hala Moddelmog will deliver a keynote address. Tickets are available for $5 on the walk or at the door.
We will most definitely revert back to our Whartonizing ways soon. But definitely not until after we’ve eaten a cupcake for a good cause.
For more details about the event, check out the press release after the jump.
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Earlier today we told you about SPEC’s Battle of the Penn Bands. Almost immediately, an argument (Mask and Wig vs. any other musical group) raged in several passionate comments. Unfortunately, it will be awhile before we find out who will win, or even participate in, that part of Fall Festival. But there’s more to this event, which will take place on College Green Saturday, October 10. More than Penn bands doing covers of pop songs, you say? Why yes!
After weeks of trying to trick committee members into divulging the Fall Festival musical guest before the official press release, we finally succeeded. Fine, the official press release is out. Their lips were seriously sealed! Anyway, in what they hope will be the first many Penn-wide autumn dance parties, SPEC will present Super Mash Bros, a collaboration between Nicolas Fenmore and Dick Fink, who describe themselves as “Girl Talk’s hot cousin.” The up-and-coming mash-up artists are set to hit the stage at 6:30 p.m. Luckily for those of you who like to sing along to every word at a concert, all of Super Mash Bros’ music is available for free download here.
Also keeping you entertained at Fall Fest will be over 40 student organizations, inflatables, a free yoga session (gotta be flexible for the dance party), lots of food, and the cupcake truck! We’ll keep you posted with more information as it comes our way, but for now, let’s plan on meeting at the bouncy castle. We’ll be the ones jumping way higher than you.
Mayor Nutter will be on campus tonight at 7:30 in the Terrace Room of Claudia Cohen Hall, to talk to the Penn community about Philadelphia and the issues that matter to us, not some stuffy old politician with white hair and a jar of dentures beside his Tempurpedic and an absolutely boring personality. His speech will be followed by a Q & A session, so come prepared to ask hard hitting questions. We’ve got “What is your lunch meat of choice?” and, “Is it true that angels cry when I use bad language?” covered, so don’t steal those.
Be sure to send info/photos to underthebutton@gmail.com if you attend the event!