Ugh, people who seriously indulge in and get really heated over the “papers vs. exams” debate. Newsflash: when you’ve got an exam, you’d rather just sit at home and write a paper, and when you’ve got a paper, you’d rather just bang out an exam.

As a wise red crab once kindly pointed out, “the seaweed is always greener in somebody else’s lake.” Which directly translates to, “finals suck either way, and you people are the absolute worst!”

Click ahead to discover ten more things worse than finals. (And then check out the three previous installments of this feature.) Read the rest of this entry »

Everybody’s HAD IT with those kids who email an entire class listserv three days before a midterm begging someone, anyone, to send them the entire semester’s worth of notes because their computer “mysteriously crashed” or they “missed class.” Nobody has fallen for it. Ever. And carelessly losing your laptop in Mexico during Spring Break isn’t likely to garner any sympathy, but the email below sent to one HIST431 class may be the most enticing plea ever:

Dear frienemies and people I have never met,

I come to you all in a time of great need, dare I say great peril. I returned on Friday from Puerto Vallarta minus one shiny new Macbook, with which I had embarked. Is it currently in the hands of Mexican Banditos, using its awesome computing power to gain control of the cocaine trade, or was it taken by the lady who cleaned my villa? The answer: I may never know. Read the rest of this entry »

Those of you who think Valentine’s Day is just a money-making gimmick masterminded by greeting card companies, you’re WRONG. It’s not only a legitimate holiday, it’s sacred. At least, it is according to one professor in the Insurance department who sent the following email to his class. Forget about rescheduling an exam that conflicts with a job interview, but romantic dinner plans on February 14 at Le Bec-Fin?  Take a make-up!

Dear Class:
I was just made aware that our first midterm exam coincides with the evening of Valentine’s Day (Feb 14 from 6 to 7:20 pm). In order to allow those who want to celebrate Valentine’s Day to do so, I have decided to write an additional exam (at the same level as the original one). The additional exam will be given earlier in the same day, February 14th, from 12pm until 1:20pm.

Great. Now even our professors are reaffirming that being alone on Valentine’s Day is pathetic.

This was the view from under the Button this morning (Don’t even ask why we were there. Okay you got us. We were taking this picture!) before the library opened at 10:00 a.m. Maybe the early bird gets the best study carrel, but come on. It’s a Saturday!

Let the finals fun begin.

*headdesk*

With finals now officially here, everyone’s got studying and paper-writing on the brain.  As you may have noticed, UTB is continuing to update sporadically, as we will throughout exam period.  What does this mean for you?  Keep sending in tips!  See a crazy study fort in Van Pelt, or have an insane story from a weekend of formal-hopping? Hit us up!  While we wait for your tips, Street‘s editors have taken the liberty of putting together a sick playlist for you all.  (We hope it is, at least — our music editors, fresh off their “Too Cool For Street” paper plate award at this weekend’s gala extravaganza, have not deigned to contribute. Guyyyys, you’re killing us.) Clicking on each song should allow you to listen — enjoy!

“Can I Kick It?” – A Tribe Called Quest
Because, yes, I can in fact kick it. –Julia Rubin

“Mirando” – Ratatat
My favvvvvvv. –Lauren Lipsay

“Oxford Comma” – Vampire Weekend
I can’t listen to music with lyrics while I study, but the grammatical namesake of this song makes me feel academic during a study break. –Hillary Reinsberg

“Let’s Get Ready To Rumble (Remix)” – Jock Jams
Jock Jams volume I, II, III, IV. for irony. –Julie Steinberg

“Wake Up” – The Arcade Fire
Not only is it the song in the freaking amazing Where the Wild Things Are trailer, but it’s called Wake Up. It’s purpose is right there in the title. I have literally been listening to it on repeat for like three days. OK, maybe not literally. Figuratively. –Jess Spiegelman

“This Is The Day” – The The
The title says it all. –Eliza Rothstein

“Walking On Broken Glass” – Annie Lennox
Sounds so sweet, actually pretty harsh. (Ha, people say the same thing about me.) –Heather Schwedel