If you’re like us, you’re really good at curling your hair, slathering on that Mac lipgloss and teetering around in heels. You are kind, nurturing and know how to GET DOWN AND DIRTY. Your one subpar quality when it comes to nailing the other sex: you know nothing about football. Or any sport for that matter. So, we’ve decided to give you a little nudge in the right direction. Here, ladies (and gentz, cuz that’s a thing) – your cheat sheet for how to impress the man in your life when the hot wings come out, the boys gather ’round, and the game comes on.
1. Know who is playing: The 49ers and the Ravens. It’s not hard. Don’t screw up the number or make lighthearted reference to this particular “Raven.” I’m pretty sure only 3% of the room will own up to watching Disney Channel.
2. Serve up a fun fact!: Did you know the two coaches of the opposing teams are actually brothers? Did you know Raven Ray Lewis is playing his last game? Well, now you do. During the hushed silence as the boys ogle over Beyonce’s tush, confidently state one of these convenient facts and you’ll be sure to score a few points.
3. Bring some food: hot wings, pizza, french fries, beer, etc etc. Anything fried, anything that goes well with ranch dressing. But we swear to G – if you dare to bring your grilled chicken cubes and apple to keep with your “diet” – you will lose every single point you may have gained. Nobody wants to watch the SuperBowl with this type hangin’ round.
What’s adorable, hairy, clumsy, messy and playful?! No silly not football players, but puppies!!! Before you turn on your TV for that lame, kinda sacred thing called the Super Bowl (JK), be sure to catch all the action from the Puppy Bowl IX. It airs on Animal Planet today from 3-5 p.m.
Basically it’s the ultimate aww factor featuring different breeds of puppies from a wide range of animal shelters. There is even a Kitty Halftime Show, which is the purrfect opportunity for cat lovers to tune in as well. What better way to kick off your Super Bowl Sunday?
We have even provided you with some of our favs for this year’s top dog.
Hey, sports fans! Remember the good ol’ days when you were able to watch 9 straight hours of back-to-back-to-back football games over the weekend and cram all your homework into the commercial breaks? (We still do that, too).
If you didn’t quite catch all of Sunday’s NFL post-game analysis, or someone in Pottruck switched the channel from SportsCenter to Dr. Phil during your morning jog, here’s what you missed: ex-Philly Eagles QB Donovan McNabb gave the Quakers a shoutout.
Guy, how crazy was the Super Bowl last night? No really, how was it? We heard it was a tough game between the Giants and the Tebows or something, but probably not half as competitive as the classic match between the TuneSquad and the Monstars.
Anyway, this is a big week! We got speed reading, we got Penn professors being awesome, we got van Gogh– we got everything!
Penn Research Week Who: CURF When and where: Februrary 6-10 p.m.; ARCH and Houston Hall (check link for details) Why: Research is, like, puhretty cool. Science! Beakers! Beep beep! Alright, research is actually so much more than mixing chemicals and making liquids change color. Penn has one metric butt-ton (1 MBT) of money sitting around for grants for students to pursue their interests and discover much more about the academic field that most appeals to them- science, history…even communications! Go for it!
Ever heard of football? Yeah, we have too! The Super Bowl XLVI (How do you pronounce XLVI/what do those letters mean?????) is happening tonight, and though we’re pretty excited about it, we’re even more psyched about this golden oldie Homecoming game that went down on our turf in 1967. This vintage footage, dug up by our friends over at Dueling Tampons, has it all: music, Franklin Field, those people with the helmets and more! Pretty neat, eh?
Attention seniors! It’s your last football game ever and apparently some fancy stuff will be going down at halftime to salute you. C’mon— it’s your last chance to wear obnoxious Penn scarves and not look as obnoxious (everyone knows it’s too hot in the Palestra for them), last shot to throw toast and last go at closing your eyes and pretending you go to a raging state school. The weather will even be crisp and beautiful (see above) for seniors and underclassmen alike.
If you’re really feeling lazy, follow our friends at the Buzzfor important sports info all day. But go! School spirit is cute, and Cornell sucks. Kickoff is at 1 p.m.
Sad Story, But We're Still Not Penn State— In case anyone asks about that awful child sex abuse allegations scandal, that happened to a PennState football staffer, not any of ours. Still really sad if it's true, though.
This weekend is a big one for Penn sports: we’ve got the Line tonight (complete with new “you don’t have to stay the whole time to come” rules), then an epic Penn-Yale showdown across four separate games on Saturday and Sunday. Planning on heading to Franklin or Rhodes Field (the weather will be lovely, we suggest you do)? Don’t be an uneducated fan! Here’s some things you can reference to prove you know more about Yale than they do about Penn, and a few things you might even be able to taunt them for.