Big news for Penn sports: tomorrow at noon is the Penn vs. Harvard football game and at 7:30 PM Men’s Soccer battles Harvard in the Ivy League championships, held at our own Rhodes Field. And they want an audience–so much that they’re not playing games with these games. A tipster notified us that Penn Athletics is promising free Penn knit caps for the first 1000 attendees!
Props to the teams: we’re actually tempted, even knowing it is supposed to rain tomorrow. What can we say, we love free stuff. And with last year’s Making History event long past us and Homecoming come and gone, freebies are looking to be few and far between in the near future.
Almost as rare as Penn championship games.
If we had ever bothered to take Psych, we might have learned about cognitive dissonance, but instead, we’re going to just use the term as a way to introduce two wacky weekend events that seem sort of dissonant to us. Ok then.
A tipster emailed us to tell us about Biketoberfest tomorrow afternoon at Dock Street Brewery (which has really good vegan pizza, or so we hear). Says the tipster: “who wouldn’t want to read about people in lederhosen attempting to cycle under the influence?” We totally agree.
Also tomorrow, Blarney’s is hosting an 11 a.m. kegs and eggs tailgate before the football game. Kegs and eggs, you say? Reminds us of this strip club in Providence we heard about from a friend at Brown: one morning a week, they do legs and eggs, which kind of creeps us out.
Happy Friday!
Last week, Lily Avnet schooled us in football lingo in her new column, Sports for Chicks. Today, she’s back with some more pointers for convincingly faking an interest in sports.
So you find yourself in a scenario with a favorable guy-to-girl ratio and for once you’re surrounded by hotties. Now the pressure is on to show off your knowledge of the current economic crisis or offer your take on the brilliance of the Sarah Palin “cut and run” debate response. But wait. Oh no. Suddenly you’re awash in a sea of yellow cards, flagrant fowls, and three point conversion plays. Yup, you just got cornered into a conversation about (gasp) sports. Now you’re left with two alternatives:
A) Stand there and nod. Pretend you know what they’re talking about (play defense).
B) Awkwardly slip away and save yourself the embarrassment of not being able to participate in this discussion (bench yourself).
Well, if you are unsatisfied with either of these two options, I’d like to offer a Plan C. The media has taught you far more than you realize about sports. Everyone knows Kobe Bryant owns the basketball court while Tiger Woods dominates the verdant pastures of the golf course. By using the logic-based skills that surely got you into to Penn you can absolutely navigate a sports-based conversation, or at least manage to stay afloat.
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Welcome to the first edition of Sports for Chicks, the self-explanatory brainchild of UTB contributor Lily Avnet. Today she gives us the 411 on that most macho of sports, football.
Sports for Chicks: Ignoring the differences between baseball and football since 2008.
Every weekend hundreds of Penn women wonder why their boyfriend/bff/fling from last night has not called them back. Ladies, I have a revolutionary answer, an earth shattering revelation: football. See, every weekend as we anxiously wait for that text, all our gentlemen seem to be “playing hard to get.” While I in no way wish to demean the flirtational capacity of our Penn boys, I’d like to offer a simple solution rather than whining, “he’s just not that into you.” Think positively. Take a deep breath and say, “Today he’s just more into Brett Favre.”
Indeed, every Saturday a multitude of men must watch their favorite colleges and universities duke it out while simultaneously trying to catch a glimpse of their shirtless friend from high school who painted his face and decided to rock a beer hat for the occasion.
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Big news for Penn sports: tomorrow at noon is the Penn vs. Harvard football game and at 7:30 PM Men’s Soccer battles Harvard in the Ivy League championships, held at our own Rhodes Field. And they want an audience–so much that they’re not playing games with these games. A tipster notified us that Penn Athletics is promising free Penn knit caps for the first 1000 attendees!
