The stars have aligned and UTB is divinely inspired to deliver today’s horoscope. Behold our interpretations.
Aries: This is a real time to buckle down and fortify your career. Go on, fortify! Perhaps consider paying a visit to Claire Klieger. (<3)
Taurus: Wear colorful clothing and stay positive. Put on your trendiest gear and strut your stuff down Locust Runway as if you were a D2S model. You’re a star!