Shoutout season is upon us, so inhale the sweet, sweet smell of revenge. Lowbrow airs your grievances and tells you exactly who shit the bed, literally and figuratively. But never fear, the rest of the issue has so much more than ads you can use to wipe your tears.
Whether you’re a nostalgic senior or a lowly freshman, Highbrow gives you the chance to score a highly coveted Round Up Superlative. Hey, at least they don’t use your yearbook picture! If that’s not enough to get you in the mood for a vacation, Ego helps you choose your own summer adventure (spoiler: that’s not code for a Goldman internship), Music goes cross country to scope out the best festivals, and Food and Drink pick out the best chilly snacks around Philly that are sure to keep you cool. If you’d rather beat the heat inside an air–conditioned theatre, well that just sucks. Film explains why. And in honor of Throwback Thursday (if you’re into that, no judgement) Art goes back in time to the best of Penn poets past. Finally, this week’s feature tackles abstinence (or lackthereof) by choice (or lackthereof) at Penn. Oh, and robots are taking over the world in the international Robocup. Let the games begin…
With Ever–loving, Maraschino–sweet, unpopped love,
Don’t even think about taking advantage of VP’s extended study hours and doing work this Fling weekend. However, you have three homework assignments to complete amidst the debauchery:
1. Submit to SHOUTOUTS. Oh-we-oh-we-oh-we-oh.
2. Take pics with FLING STANLEY. Bonus if A-Gut photo-bombs.
3. Tip us your greatest TEXTS FROM FLING.
That’s right, for the third straight Fling, we’ll be compiling your greatest texts from the weekend for an upcoming UTB feature! Send ‘em in to firstname.lastname@example.org all weekend! Include yo area code so it looks like this:
(215): Hii hiow far does pennride go out???!! i’m stranded in Viullanova HELP ME IM POOR
As Rebecca Stein once said, there is no such thing as a free lunch—just as there is no such thing as a truly waived tuition. However, from what we hear from the most secretive of sources, certain events organically originate as orgies, while others are forcibly filmed for the furious art–fucks of Filmadelphia.
In other news, some of our sections decided to stray Off the Beat(en) path and took a hike towards a healthier, fitter life. We can’t guarantee the advice is too great though. Still, if you’re just looking for a walk, stroll down the flavorlicious Fishtown in Street’s newly reinvented Flavorhoods, ’cause it’s always a beautiful day to be a neighbor (won’t you be ours?) Tired of old jingles like that? Then get a jump on campus’ shittiest music, from Saxby’s to Saigon and beyond. Tired off all the shittiness? Then get some culture at PIFA. It’s pifftastic.
Love. Dystopia. Corn being like sex. Welcome to the world of fact (or fiction), as Street brings you its Annual Fiction Issue.
This week, Highbrow welcomes the return of the LocustLexicon, providing you with acronyms that are perfect ad libs when you’re SALFing from the SNAG that you slept with last weekend. Wow, TWA. Ego decides to tackle another important (yet we still have classes?) calendar day and center everything on our favorite Prez, A-Gutt. Not really. Instead, we’re having a palooza to celebrate the dear past heads of our country. Puck Frinceton. And Woodrow Wilson. Arts gets all dreamy with Shepard Fairey. Read the rest of this entry »
It’s just about lunchtime. How much does your sandwich suck? Kidding, we love those (just not the gross ones from Mark’s Cafe — could they use any more mayo?!). Here’s a better question: have you seen the Dining Guide? If not, get it. NOW. 34th Street’s reviewed 20 of Philly’s best spots to get grub happy, and none of them involve truffle oil, raw dieting, or fried-cricket-tacos, which do exist. Pick up a copy before they’re all gone. Just don’t eat it.
P.S. They’ve got Love for you tomorrow, so get that one, too.
Jeez, it’s hot out! We think you should stay indoors– those pit stains don’t match your pants.
Yesterday, we tried getting out of bed. We couldn’t. We wrote Summer Street instead.
Monday brought Playlist of the Week (workout style). Today, Street shows you how to swim, bike and run in Philadelphia like you’re the iron man himself. Pick it up on stands.
You couldn’t think that’s all! We’ve also got a review of the PMA’s Visions of Arcadia exhibit (it’s, like, so rapturous — which is a word from the thesaurus), a Street Burger Shakedown between Bobby’s and Shake Shack, and oh so much more.
Oh yeah. Write for us. We’ve got the A/C, because Street loves you.
Last Call! Today's the very last day to submit all your Shoutouts! Get 'em in by midnight and then wait with bated breath for the last 34th Street issue of the semester, coming atcha this Thursday!
We know you’re feeling :( because there’s no Street this week, but cheer up, kid. We’ve got something arguably better than Shoutouts after break- yup, Spring Break Texts From Last Night! Now you can let the world know how jealous you are everyone on your hall is going to Puerto Vallarta or that idiot in your writing seminar is going to Europe while you’re stuck at home. The best ones will go in print in our March 15th publication. Snazzy, eh?
Submit your Spring Break texts to us before midnight on March 12th. Sound good? Good. And have a wonderful break or whatever.
It’s February 22nd, 2012, and you know what that means– yup, it’s Ash Wednesday and National Margarita day! Also, SHOPPING GUIDE DAY! Nestled within today’s DP you’ll find reviews of the neatest and newest shops ‘n stops in Philadelphia, from vintage boutiques to a rad South Street teahouse.
Don’t feel like go all the way to campus to pick one up? Check out the PDF version here. And as usual, get excited for tomorrow’s regular Street. Now, go get some margaritas and do some shopping! It’s too nice outside to stay cooped up in the ‘brary.
Still alive? Congrats! Looks like you’ve survived snowpocalypse 2k12. Pat yourself on the back with this week’s Street.
Street‘s all about the romance this week. Film’s got some helpful suggestions of where to take your slam piece after a movie. Food & Drink plays (and wins) matchmaker. And Arts keeps it classy as always, with an adorable DIY bookmark perfect for your paperback erotica.
But if you’re more the type who wants to punch those heart-shaped balloons every time you walk by CVS, Feature has an escape route to West Philly.
Ego’s got the girls behind the vagina costumes. Music has some advice for all you sucka frat DJs. Lowbrow’s got the 411 on how to get out of hazing (shoutout to the UA! holla!) And, as always, Highbrow brings you the gossip, where the special musical guest this week is Kweder.
Writer’s meeting tonight! We want you. 4015 Walnut. 6:30.