Alas, we’ve hit that crucial point during finals: some people are done and others still have exams on Monday and Tuesday. Good thing there’s light at the end of the tunnel. Here’s a list of the five best ways to procrastinate in these last few days of darkness:
1. Actually use the library resources…to dirty-chat the librarians ;)
2. And if that doesn’t quite do it for ya, there’s always 50 Shades fan-fiction. Because we know that finals week is a time when most students get a little
3. If you’re looking for something a little more PG, bounce the cats on cat-bounce!
4. But if you want to feel semi-productive, you can kick it high school-style with this. What’s that? There no quiz to prepare you for your OPIM final? No worries, because there is a way to test your knowledge of these.
5.Watch the Godfather trilogy…on a computer in the Forum. We’re sure no one will mind!
Let’s face it, studying sucks, and what sucks even more is sitting in a cramped library for eight hours at a time surrounded by the same obnoxious people.
There’s the guy who falls asleep the moment he turns his computer on, the girl who “politely” asks you to plug in every Apple product known to man, and that one person that decided it was a great idea to get a five-course meal delivered to his study cubicle.
As Penn kids in the midst of finals, we can all relate. Here are the ten annoying things that happen to us in study spaces. Happy studying, everyone! Read the rest of this entry »
We’re dreaming of a
white Christmas weeknight bootycall library that hasn’t reached maximum occupancy this week. Despite Fisher’s current lack of seats (bitter), we’re glad the setup has changed significantly since 1900, when this photo was taken. Looks like a perfect place to cram for Intro to Claustrophobia or cry about that last BYO/mixer/shitshow you’re missing. Don’t fret honey child, you’re evidently amongst friends, and there’s always next year.
Everyone needs a little pick-me-up to take the edge off of finals week. We encourage it! Late night insomnia delivery, venti NON-skinny latte, go crazy. Looks like someone took it a little too far today in a Van Pelt bathroom and got down in between review sessions, leaving their (large) container of lube behind. At least they had the courtesy not to relieve their stress in the stacks? Just know that this is NOT what we meant when we said Rosenparty. And if you’re into that, some suggested material…
It’s finals time. You’re looking for the optimal place to study, but you can’t find any more
beds carrels in Van Pelt – we’re here to help you find some of the niche study spaces on campus, as always. Freshbabies, be attentive!
Fisher Fine Arts – Silence. You take one poop too loud in the restroom and you’re blacklisted.
Education Commons – Any NARP (non-athletic regular person) is welcome, but the place reeks of balls: foot, soft, base, basket, you name it!
Rooftop Lounges – Avoid Harrison. You’ll get stuck in an elevator, most likely with a stressed out freshman who hasn’t showered for days named Sitswithpig. Read the rest of this entry »
The clock strikes 11:00 p.m. You’re in Rosenparty, the adderall is wearing off and you’ve resorted to looking at pictures of calzones. You wander into Mark’s–the sight of soggy, plastic-wrapped sandwiches almost kills your appetite–but not quite. Desperation is imminent. So what’s it gonna be, bb? We consulted our fanciest food astrologists, and now we have all the answers. Read on to find out what your late night study snack really says about you.
Anything from La Petite Creperie–You are that guy: the overeager kid at the 7th grade spring dance in the baby blue tux and bow tie, except that bow tie is covered in mozzarella and creamy feta, calling out “eat me!” in Salma Hayek’s voice–sorry, what were we saying? We can’t concentrate because we’re staring at your food. Read the rest of this entry »
Finals season is here, and if you’re reading this, it probably means you can’t study. If you’re in Van Pelt or Fisher, the guy in front of you won’t stop farting and some idiot nearby is chewing gum with an open mouth. (Seriously, stop that.) If you’re in Saxby’s– Well, if you’re lucky enough to have a table, let alone a power source– it’s so loud that you want to headbutt your Math104 textbook. The point is, your regular study spots suck. If you’re not willing to stay secluded in your room but don’t want to go downtown for a quiet corner, let UTB guide you in the direction of your dream study space.
Sweeten Alumni House
Location and hours: 3533 Locust Walk; varies, closed at nights
Food nearby?: Yes
Best for: Writing a paper
Description: How many times have you passed by this place without even giving it a second thought? The Alumni House isn’t just for alumni– anyone can use it. It’s really lovely inside, with comfy couches, nice bookshelves, fireplaces, and dark wooden chairs. And it’s so close to everything on campus, it’s almost a crime you’re not there now.
Read the rest of this entry »
The last leg of the semester is no picnic on College Green. Between
bullshitting writing papers, sweet-talking that B+ into an A- and dealing with the last minute midterms professors toss in just to watch us suffer, finding time to so much as remember that–holy crap it’s December?–can be a struggle.
That’s why we’re here to remind you that, hey, there’s life (and food, and sleep) outside your resident VP carrel! And with the holidays almost here, it’s time to let go of all your inhibitions and really get in touch with your inner (s)elf. Here’s our comprehensive, politically incorrect guide to Christmas-ing (slash Hanukkah-ing, Kwanzaa-ing, or generic holiday-ing) your campus life.
1. Invest In A Christmas Tree: Whether it’s the real thing or a poorly assembled pyramid of green twine, you need a place to hang your
paper snowflakes pine cones super fancy ornaments. Bonus(!!!): throw a few pine needles in your roommate’s bed next time she noms your Greek Lady leftovers. Read the rest of this entry »
Wharton’s One School Group is certainly upping the accountability quotient with this new list of rules for studying in Huntsman. Gone are the days when leaving your laptop and backpack on a table while you ran to the bathroom constituted a signal that you were indeed working there – other students now have the school-sanctioned right to swoop in and move your stuff. Seat theft aside, there’s also a nice reminder that no one is entitled to priority seating in Huntsman (except when it comes to GSRs).