FeaturesFebruary 9, 2011 at 12:56 pm

This Week In Crime

Crime. The very word shatters the hopeful hearts of most students, afeared of West Philadelphia’s hardened criminals roaming free in a city known for its chaotic lawlessness. “Crime.” The hard crack of the word lingers in the air when said aloud, floating like a threatening ghost. Crime.

Worry not, kids: not a ton of crazy stuff happened this week. Let’s take a look at all the stupid things people have done this week. Who’s in the mood for some legal tussles? You are?! Then away we go!

On February 2nd, a 39 year old woman by the name of Earline Byers “was arrested at about 2:45 a.m. for allegedly taking an unattended coat at Smokey Joe’s, at 210 S. 40th St.” Let’s explore this situation with a good old fashioned hypothetical. Picture it: February 2nd. The losers from last night’s horrific Feb Club kickoff are occupied at Blarney. You’re with your girls. You’re ready for Sink or Swim.

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