Facebook Events Exposed: Mid-August Edition

As NSO rapidly approaches (three weeks, kids), we at UTB have taken it upon ourselves to mine the depths of Facebook and see how we can keep ourselves occupied until then. Thankfully, we have come across a few gems. Enjoy.

Event: CYA Goes Speed Dating with Harvard, UPenn, Berkeley and MIT! Location: San Francisco The What: "This speed dating event offers the best: brief meetings followed by an open mixer with Ivy Plus grads in your age range. Best of all, you never have to ask for a phone number or an email address. Just log on to the Right Stuff’s secure speed dating web site afterwards and start exchanging messages." The Realz: Stanford alums plan mixer with nerds and state schoolers. UTB Says: As if speed dating (or networking) wasn't awkward enough, let's throw some MIT kids in the mix and have a "cash bar with non-alcoholic beverages." So... no.

Event: THE XXX PARTY Location: Hong Kong The What: "The organizers of XXX are not throwing this party just for the sake of throwing parties/making money. We are throwing this party with the aim to promote good music amongst the Hong Kong nightlife scene. The organizers have one common goal in mind: to reciprocate the clubbing ambiance found at global music festivals and high-end clubbing scenes found at IBIZA and ULTRA MUSIC FESTIVAL and the likes. The organizers feel that there’s a lack of appreciation towards Electro and House music within the young groups of socialites that dominate the college party scene in Hong Kong." The Realz: Hong Kong club promoters list LSE and Penn as hosts for a party that promises "DIRTY BEATS + PARTY ANIMALS + DANCE BATTLES." UTB Says: We don't think it will top Transit, but we're all about the the alleged "600 complimentary cocktail shots" that will be available throughout the night. And we wonder if this is related to last week's absurdly-named "Penn hosted" event, Giorgio @ Armani Bar.

Event: Complimentary Cold Cuts Location: Du Bois College House The What: "The staff over at Cold Cuts would like to extend a warm welcome to the newly arriving class of 2013. Knowing the struggles faced by many upon arriving on campus when trying to find a competent barber, we refuse to let you drop 15-20 beans on a cut, only to end up wishing that you were still scruffy. Thus, we bring you: Complimentary Cold Cuts." The Realz: Enterprising senior in Du Bois 319 offers free haircuts to frosh during NSO. UTB Says: While we were in search of pre-NSO events to keep ourselves busy, this was just too good. While the free cut offer only lasts through NSO, "head barber" Collin Williams offers $10 cuts out of his room all year long.