"Barbie Society Of Penn" Is Ernest's Newest Venture

After his disqualification from the 2014 presidential race, tabloid prince Ernest Owens is keeping himself busy with the new, mysterious Barbie Society of Penn, which we discovered on Facebook. We don't have much intel on the group, except that it describes itself as, "The most sexxy, sophisticated ladies (plus a gay) have established a society for all us Penn Barbies to unite!" Look out, it seems as though Penn's getting a dose of the Plastics.

The group goes on to describe its mission statement of sorts:

"We are the sexxiest, and most successful Quakers at the University of Pennsylvania. We are dedicated to self-empowerment and uniting all attractive Barbies at Penn together through social events! Single handedly annihilating every wack Penn bitch in the building with our fierce appeal."

All we can say is that "wack" Penn bitches better step aside.