Chasing Amy: A-Gut Does Copa Wednesday

[Disclaimer: This article was part of our "Joke Day" series... if you couldn't tell by the usage of Comic Sans.] Madame the President was spotted at Copabanana last night. According to fellow denizens of Copa, she was the life of the party. As one freshmen (who wished to remain anonymous due to underage drinking laws) told us, "She has the best stories and always tells the funniest jokes. Definitely inviting her to my next girls' night! Love her!" And so do we, especially since it was widely rumored that she broke out some Coyote Ugly-style dance moves on the bar. However, when we contacted the Office of the President for further details, the reply was, "No comment."