Christian Guy Eats At Hillel, Doesn't Feel Awkward At All

[Disclaimer: This article was part of our "Joke Day" series... if you couldn't tell by the usage of Comic Sans.] A Catholic student Wednesday night said he was "pleasantly surprised" when he dined at Hillel without feeling at all out of place. Christopher Johnson, College '14, said he had heard good things about the dining hall, but always avoided it due to fears he would be singled out as a lover of Jesus.

"There was no pointing fingers, no asking me to say prayers, nothing," Johnson remarked. "It was quite normal. Makes me feel kinda bad about the whole Inquisition thing."

A recent study quoted in the DP shows that Johnson is not alone; approximately 38% of the freshman class reported having a similar experience. A staggering 100% made some sort of lame joke about the situation, while only 12% felt it was appropriate to sit next to random diners and gush about how much they love Jon Stewart, Adam Sandler, and Ruth Bader Ginsberg.