Phi Delt Bathroom Runs Out Of Toilet Paper

[Disclaimer: This article was part of our "Joke Day" series... if you couldn't tell by the usage of Comic Sans.] Female toilet-goers said they were "grossed out" at a fraternity gathering this Saturday night, when they were shocked and surprised by the lack of a clean roll of toilet paper in the bathroom. A College sophomore explained that she had gone into the bathroom with a friend who happened to have a pack of tissues, so they "just used that as toilet paper." A Wharton junior, however, was less fortunate when she defied social norms and used the toilet alone. "Do guys not wipe?" she asked quizzically.

The fraternity president said "the dumbass social chairs will be making a trip to Costco ASAP."