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Looking For Lolita

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By IAN BUSSARD

October 6, 2011 at 9:58 am

"Light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul." We're sorry, did our dramatic reading of Lolita just rouse you from your post-second breakfast nap (people have those, right? Ok)? Well, ladies, if you're looking for your very own Humbert Humbert, just check Craiglist! For the low, low price of the blossom of your youth, you could have your very own "sponsor":

See, miracles do happen! Full text (and more!) after the jump.

So if you like:

  • Funds
  • Being a nice model
  • Men who are professional and also Penn graduates and also nice gentlemen
  • Men who want to know your interest* (*Note: just one interest.)
  • Pleasant surprises
then– Wowee!– hop on the next trolley to Center City! But be careful. In conclusion, this has been a very fruitful week for Craigslist.

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