New Study: We're Probably Going To Die Young And Unhappy

But we're all going to die anyway, so what's the problem? It seems like some newfangled study that turned up in this month's Journal for Applied Psychology indicates that the young and ambitious on the prestigious education-competitive profession track (that's us!) often die young and unhappy. As HuffPo College reports, the case is even worse for ambitious underachievers, whose consistent poor performance yet high expectations frequently lead to low life satisfaction. This makes us feel sad, but also determined for a better future, so we'll probably die...next month? Mmmkay.

Mind you, the study was carried out solely on 717 Californians born at the beginning of the last century, and there's a lot of room for debate over the definitions of "ambitious," "young," "selective," "prestigious," and "underachiever"; but though the relevance of the findings may only be marginal, the wider implications may still ring true for us. In any case, between this and the 2012 apocalypse, it's becoming clear that the goddesses are VERY angry with us.