What's HapPENNing, Stuff Your Face Edition

September at Penn. The best time to crash GBMs of clubs you'll never join just for the free pizza. Seriously, we know who you are. If you do eventually run out of events to steal food from, we've got you covered! Take a break from your cruelty-free, hand picked Sweetgreen lettuce to check out something new.

Cinco de Distrito When: Thursday, September 12th, 4p.m.- tequilaaaaaa in the a.m. Where: Distrito Philadelphia, 3945 Chestnut St Why: To celebrate 5 years in University City, Distrito wants everyone to get their fiesta on! Drink specials, a happy hour menu, and you can even enter a raffle to win a Corona Bicycle. (Can we just have the beer?)

Baltimore Avenue Dollar Stroll When:  September 12, 2013, 5:30-8:30 p.m. Where: Come on folks, you know this one. (43rd - 51st) Why: You're too poor for Distrito Over 30 different vendors (including Subway, lulz) and the Baltimore Avenue Pet Shoppe (meow?) will be dishin' up deliciousness for just a buck!

Center City Restaurant Week When: September 15-20 & 22-27 Where: Philly's finest eateries Why: Pretend you're a hoity toity food critic for only a $20 lunch and a $35 dinner. Brag to friends.

Houston Update: Market Noodles Adios, tacos, hello market noodles! The new Asian eatery in Houston Hall will serve "fairly authentic" aka pretty questionable small plates, rice bowls, and noodle bowls. We'll miss the weird knockoff Chipotle burritos, but actually we won't.

Another One Bites the Burrito Dust Another Mexican victim falls to the Asian food trend: a new Korean and Japanese restaurant called U-Town has replaced MexiCali on 40th and Sansom. What does the U stand for?