What Your College House Says About You: A Comprehensive Guide To Freshman Housing

Today, thousands of members of Penn's most exclusive class ever will move in to their freshman year rooms across campus. We know it can be a stressful time for new students and their parents alike, so we  interviewed two upperclassmen (X and Y) to hear the inside scoop.

UTB: We  hear the #quadorbust line so many times from all the freshman. Is the Quad actually the best place to live?

Y: Generally speaking, yes. People here are friendly because its what they're told they have to do. It's close to Wawa, parties, and the more interesting parts of campus. Living elsewhere is a major pain in the ass. Extra points given for the fine architecture.

X: There is a clear hierarchy of College Houses in the Quad. Ware comes in at #1, seeming to draw both beautiful people and rowdy socialites. Riepe – quaint and sceney – comes in at a solid #2. Fisher, usually the last choice of those living in the Quad, minus the Nipple, is third, but still lightyears ahead of Hill.

Y: Basically. You're going to have to try to make the best of the excruciating heat, poor location, and the smell of burnt meat in this College House. Proximity to the non-Commons Starbucks (and the alleged so-called "sense of community") is the only real positive here.

Y: I'm not sure what you're talking about.

X: Federal Donuts.

X/Y: Sure.

Riepe - NYC

Hill - Schvitzy

Kings Court English - Obscure

Ware - Pretty

Fisher Hassenfeld - Nipple