17 New Penn Traditions To Consider Starting

Congratulations, you managed to sleep with someone under the button without getting caught on tape (yes, there are cameras, buhbye grandkids’
legacy). Or maybe you didn’t succeed. Maybe the PennPo cramped your style, or maybe you just couldn’t get it up.

Whatever your misfortune, we feel some new
Penn traditions are in order! We’re tired of peeing on Ben, failing midterms because of the compass, yada yada yada. So instead, summon your peers
and have a go at one of these new traditions:

- Practice abstinence on top of the button 

- Bathe in the clawfoot tub in the Kelly Writers House
bathroom

- Ensure a brighter future by removing a brick from DRL every year (slowly but surely, it will cease to exist) 

- Continue your rational boycott of Qdoba

- BYO the highrise computer lab

- Introduce rats to the highrises

- Introduce bats to the highrises

- TP AGut’s house on Halloween

- Rummage through AGut’s garbage
for gold

- Host a sit-in on the steps of
DRL

- Give the Ben Franklin statue a
scrub down

- Start a food fight in Commons
using only gluten free foods

- Christen
a new smoking spot

- Spend a night under the recently
renovated 38^th Street bridge (aka the Bridge of Broken Dreams)

- Steal a cart from the highrises
on move-in day and roll down the Bridge of Broken Dreams

- Play ‘Where’s Waldo’ with the Theta house (Get it? Because
they’re blocked by a building now!)

- Streak through the Quad on the
first day of snow