25 Ways To Make Home Feel Like Penn
November 28, 2014 at 2:29 pm
We can't believe that Penn gives us a whole two days off for Thanksgiving Break. As much as we love reuniting with our loved ones over this long weekend, we also understand that living without a serial shitter can be a bit of a let down. Your heart fills with longing as your nose fills with the all-too-pleasant scent of a Glade candle. That's why we decided to bring you 25 ways to make your stay at home feel, well, a little bit more home-away-from-homey.
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Wear flip flops in the shower!
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Let your food sit for awhile to give it that stale, lukewarm Penn Dining taste!
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Chug – don’t sip – wine at dinner.
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Poor raw sugar into the wine to make it taste more like Franzia. Ask to "slap the bottle."
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Cover the toilet seat with toilet paper.
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Refer to your dining room as “Commons.”
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Convince your sisters to follow you around to maintain that on-point ratio.
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Dress up and wander around your neighborhood after 12am. Try to find out "what's going on."
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Put some tampons outside your house and tell your high school friends to come meet you at The Tampons.
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Try to swipe your PennCard to enter your bedroom.
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Ask your mom to say “enjoy, baby” when she gives you food so that you feel like you’re swiping into Commons.
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Ask for a to-go box as you eat Thanksgiving leftovers.
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Refer to your father as your mother’s DFMO.
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Tell your sister to leave her hair all over the shower walls.
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Pour all of your beverages into a Brita filter.
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Go to Chipotle and stand still for half an hour before ordering. Even if there isn't a line.
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Put a Septa token into your car’s ignition before driving.
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Read UTB on your laptop during family dinnertime as if it's a lecture.
- Venmo Grandma 5 bucks for Thanksgiving dinner. Score!
- Flyer for your club’s event in your house's driveway. Have your parents walk by and try to avoid your gaze.
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Refuse to hang out with your BFF from high school because her house is as far away as DRL.
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Try to schedule an appointment with your parents for some well-needed advice only to find out that they’re booked for the next month straight.
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Accidentally sleep through your dog's office hours.
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Replace your queen-sized bed with two extra-long twins and ask a complete stranger to live with you for 8 months.
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Threaten to MERT your drunk uncle.