Eulogy For A Water Bottle Left In VP

In the Rosengarten Study Center in VP stands a cart, filled with the discarded water bottles of forgetful students. Below, is one student's apology to a lost friend, but we like to think it applies to them all:

In the beginning I thought there was no way we could ever be apart. I bursar'd you for more money than I would like to admit because I thought we were going to be together forever. You, with your blue plastic casing and enlarged "P." Me, with my proclivity for drinking large quantities of water to stay awake during three hour seminars. We were perfect, until one day I was working in VP and I probably left you there, on the table that is too close to the bathroom, in my haste to print before class.

I noticed your absence when I got home that night, a lightness in my backpack that made me feel empty. I walked around the next few days, thirsty, until I passed by the DVD check out place and caught a glimpse of blue plastic through the window. There you were, surrounded by others of your kind. I was about to go retrieve you, but I stopped. How could I be sure it was you? Was I willing to allow for the possibility of drinking from the bottle of another? I thought you might be happier there, among friends. Either way, I didn't get you, and I'm sorry. Maybe, I'll sift through the lost and found during Finals. More likely, I will not.