15 Things You're Expected To Know For Finals

Look, we were all for being optimistic yesterday, but after spending a solid 24 hours in the Rodin Rooftop Lounge (don't deny it's the best one), we've about had it. So follow along as we count down the 15 craziest kernels of bullshit we're expected to know for finals. Think of it as a comprehensive study guide? 

1. Earth's internal magnetic field behaves as if a bar magnet were placed 115° from Earth's axis of rotation. 
2. The nineteenth-century Russian noblesse were generally less attached to their estates because their titles largely came from government or military service rather than land ownership. 
3. Writing Seminar helped you grow both as a Person and a Scholar. 
4. The effect of neoliberal principles and the resulting battle over public and private space in a rapidly globalizing world. 
5. The role and the importance of a wife's sexuality both within and without a marriage, as depicted in Geoffrey Chaucer's The Canterbury Tales. 
6. Both the immediate and long-term effects of the 1989 Tiananmen Square protests. 
7. Medieval literature can be understood as the "amalgam of the aristocratic (or court-derived) and bourgeois (or city-derived) values."
8. The Christian derivation of "sin." Is it inherent, or a choice?
9. The mechanism for base-catalyzed epimerization of glucose.
10. The structure of cloning vector pUC18. 
11. The Brinster Method for Producing Transgenic Mice.
12. The Great Vowel Shift...
13. How to say "diarrhea" repeatedly in Chinese.
14. The biological disposition of humans' vocal tract has evolved so that we are now more likely to choke and die on our food than we were over 3,000 years ago. 
15. The definition of "culture." 

We did not sign up for this.