Pro/Con/Con: Seeing Hoodie Allen Ironically

Here at UTB, we like to make value judgements in a "Pro/Con/Pro" format. However, today's topic was unanimously decided to be a net loss: hence, the "Pro/Con/Con." We asked ourselves, "Is it worth it to see Hoodie Allen in concert?" No. Certainly not. Then we asked, "Is it worth it to see Hoodie Allen ironically?"

Well, here are the facts. Make of them what you may.

SURFACE LEVEL SHIT

Pro: Tons of Chicks

Con: All the girls are 13-15

Con: Going to jail

Pro: Tickets are only $30

Con: Your mother will see the credit card charge and roast you for seeing Hoodie Allen

Con: Opportunity cost of doing literally anything else with 30 dollars and two hours of your time

Pro: Copping that sweet Hoodie merch

Con: You’re gonna get your ass beat on the way home for wearing Hoodie merch

Con: The vast majority of his merch isn't hoodies...which is confusing

BRAGGING RIGHTS

Pro: You’ll be the only one of your friends who have seen hoodie

Con: There’s a reason why

Con: You’ll no longer have friends

Pro: Wale might be there

Con: Two bad rappers for the price of one

Con: You’ll probably mispronounce Wale

Pro: Wharton pride

Con: Donald Trump also went to Wharton

Con: You’re in the College

IRONY

Pro: You’re seeing him as joke

Con: The joke isn’t funny

Con: The joke is on you

Pro: Potential for ironic sex with Hoodie Allen

Con: Ironic sex is just about the same as regular sex

Con: You run the risk of conceiving an ironic child

Pro: If you go, you can probably write for Street

Con: They've already interviewed him

Con: Might not be scene enough to publish