Penn Students Delete Uber, Seizing Opportunity to Escape Low User Ratings

Although the hashtag #deleteuber has been trending nationally due to the CEO's affiliation with a certain POTUS, some Penn students have been adopting the idea for a different reason.

"Yeah, last Thursday my friend threw up all over the Uber that I paid for. Not only did it cost me 150 bucks, but my rating is definitely in the dumps. I'm getting rid of Uber; Lyft offers me a clean slate, a tabula rasa," an unnamed college sophomore informed UTB, using an unnecessarily sophisticated phrase to describe a fresh start.

We spoke to another student, who remained anonymous but made sure to tell us on the record that he always ordered the Uber. After taking the required 8 steps to learn his user rating, he shook his head and said "A 1.7? Yo, I knew my friends were hooking up in the back of the car that one time. At this point I'm gonna have to start using Lyft."

While we admit that there is a certain beauty to the idea of a new beginning, there is another option for those who just want to forget about their terrible Uber ratings but don't care about the ethical implications of their transportation choices. Make someone else, anyone else, order the ride when you and your friends are drunk-- it's not like anyone ever remembers to Venmo charge you.