Campus Book Burnings Are at an All-Time Low: But Why?

Each year, students celebrate the end of classes by ceremoniously burning their textbooks in a fire. It is an age-old tradition that is scientifically proven to help reduce stress and anxiety levels and also contribute to global warming. What a time!

Recently, however, accounts of capriciously throwing textbooks into a billowing flame have diminished. We asked a number of sources why they think this is the case.

When we approached Adam Curry (C’20) about this concerning trend, he responded, “No one buys books anymore. Sometimes, at the end of a long semester, I drag a PDF into the virtual trashcan and it makes a satisfactory noise. That’s always a nice feeling.”

Junior Jenny Smith had similar sentiments. “All my books are downloaded to my iPad. Last year, I really wanted to burn my Orgo II textbook so I dropped my iPad into the Tap House firepit. My friends yelled at me for not being environmentally conscious so I fished it out.”

Perhaps the most troubling response we received was from Jake Fein (W’18), who explained how he tried to burn his books at a friendly bonfire with his roommates, but two members of the task force appeared and demanded that the event be shut down. 

“It was probably for the best,” said Fein. “It was an Amazon rental book anyway.”