MSG is Good for You: Study Funded by Big Noodle Causes Mass Increase in Ramen Consumption

MSG is good for you, according to a new study led by researchers at Penn Medicine. The study was generously funded by Nongshim Co.

"Over the last few years, we've found that many 'unhealthy' food items are actually good for you," said Newt Dulles, the American spokesman for Nongshi. "Chocolate. Red wine. Cheese Whiz. Monosodium glutamate is just the next addition to that list, and our ramen is chock full of it!"

While demand for ramen among Penn students was high before, it has now skyrocketed. Industrial-size packages of ramen has been arriving to the Amazon@Penn center every day. Staff at 1920 Commons report that that they have been swiping in fewer students; instead, many regular dining hall customers are exiting the building carrying armfuls of instant noodles.

"I used to feel bad about eating so much ramen," said Ron Eng (E '20), who chose to go off the meal plan but doesn't know how to make scrambled eggs. "But after I heard about this study, I feel immensely validated." Piles of empty soup base packets litter his Harnwell apartment. He showed us his extensive collection of ramen: shrimp, chicken, udon-flavored, curry-flavored, shin ramyun. 

"I always thought Ron was shaving years off his life by consuming so much ramen," said Brian Sun (W '20), his roommate. "But I'm starting to think he's had the right idea after all. I've been eating some of it while he's not home, actually. Don't tell him."