Sophomore Thinking About Law School, Medical School, Modeling, Art School, Deep Sea Plumbing

Talk about conflicted! This student has no idea what the hell he’s going to do after college— whether it be law school, medical school, modeling, art school, or deep sea plumbing.

College sophomore Elias Kyrkagonas has absolutely no direction in life, and he’s not afraid to admit it. “I literally have no goals. Well, I guess staying alive is one,” he told us.

Kyrkagonas, who entered Penn as an intended archaeology major, estimated that he changes his major once a week. “I don’t have an advisor anymore, because my first nine hated me for being indecisive or something; I don’t really know what it was though,” he said. This jack of all trades is killing it in the ‘setting yourself up for a meaningless life’ game!

Kyrkagonas says that, in contrast to his academics, his career options are well-defined. “I know exactly what I want to do: either med school, law school, sock modeling, art school, or deep sea plumbing,” he said. “And that hasn’t changed for months.”

Between those many post-collegiate options, however, Kyrkagonas doesn’t have a clue what he’ll end up doing. “I’d say it’s about a four percent chance for each of them,” he said. “To be honest, though, I’ll probably just end up in finance or consulting.”