Wharton to Turn Half of Huntsman GSRs into Aquariums

Group study rooms (GSRs) in Huntsman Hall are small rooms designed for interdisciplinary collaboration. Much of the time, though, there are only single students in each room, or, even worse, a group of students just aggressively staring out the window at passersby.

To counter this, Wharton Dean Geoffrey Garrett is taking a unique approach to renovate the GSR system: he has decided to convert half of Huntsman GSRs into aquariums.

“I just think aquariums are so fun,” said Garrett, who was given his grandfather’s first name as his last name. “It’s not like students are doing anything in them anyway, right? Is that right? Please help me.”

The aquariums will contain a variety of venomous, blood-sucking fauna. Sea urchins, leeches, the venomous lionfish, aggressive female angler fishes, and the deadly box jellyfish will all call Huntsman home.

“The overall vibe we’re going for here is a sort of distant unfriendliness. We don’t want anything happy or colorful here—only things that will scare small children or remind us Wharton affiliates of what really matters: harming those around us for our own benefit,” said Garrett excitedly.

Once the aquariums are installed, there will be fewer awkward interactions with people behind the glass, and more near-death experiences with Japanese spider crabs ramming into the glass to try to grab students.

The tanks will only last a few weeks, as Huntsman was not originally intended to be an aquarium. With a twitch in his eyes and a threatening monotone, Garrett told us, “I think the short life span of these tanks, and the inevitable breaking of glass and loss of human life, will be a great exercise for Wharton students on the impermanence of man. They strut around thinking they’re immortal, but in reality we’re all eaten by the same worms.”