Small Talk About Fall Break Only Acceptable Until Sunday

Mark your calendars for October 14th! Aside from being National Dessert Day, this Sunday marks the last day you’re allowed to make small talk with people about fall break. 

This decision comes from the committee for the Facilitation of Undergraduates Discussing Gaps or Events (FUDGE). “Since Fall Break ends on a Sunday," a FUDGE representative told us, "by the time a week goes by, all classes and clubs have met at least once. You’ve probably already seen everyone you want to talk about it with anyway.” 

"And besides," she continued, "it seems that most of you just want a socially acceptable excuse to brag about whatever garbage you did over break. One week is all you power-tripping narcissists deserve."

The reaction to the moved-up date has been mixed among students. College junior Casey Ploss remarked, “it honestly wasn’t even a break, I just went somewhere else to do homework for two days—who cares?”

Others were upset about the shortened window, such as Wharton senior Trevor Franklin. Franklin was hoping to tell all of his classmates about his “abbreviated, but still intensive” internship with MEGABank. 

Luckily, there are still plenty of topics available for making small talk when you run into someone on Locust. Monday marks the first day to ask your friends if their parents are coming for Parents Weekend, and then laugh when someone jokes about taking them to Copa.