Penn Wellness Initiative Announces Plan To Gently Kiss Every Student On The Forehead, Tell Them They Have A Cute Smile

In an e-mail to the University community, the Penn Wellness Initiative announced their plan to improve mental health on campus by lightly kissing each student on their foreheads and say “You have such a cute smile” before lifting their lips from their skin.

Jackie Prince, VP for Wellness, is spearheading the program. “We’re going to have walk-in hours seven days a week,” she said. “Any student who needs to be held tenderly while someone plays in their hair will be able to get that now.”

Prince developed the idea based on student feedback. “So many people here were telling me that what they really needed was someone to scratch their back and whisper things like ‘I love making you laugh.’”

Erica Vazquez is a counselor who works for the program. “Students come in stressed from school and other things and you can tell it’s really taking a toll on them,” she said. “But once you lightly nibble on their ears and say ‘I think I’m really falling for you,’ they immediately start feeling better.”

Prince is optimistic that the new plan will greatly improve student mental health. “We really believe in this,” she said. “If everyone could just wake up on a Sunday morning, rain is falling, and grab some covers and share some skin, I think the world would be a much kinder place.”