University Officials Predict Flash Flooding at 'Evening With Antoni Porowski' Event Friday

In advance of SPEC's "Evening with Antoni Porowski" event this Friday, University officials have issued a warning of severe flash flooding in Irvine Auditorium and the surrounding areas.

According to a press release from Penn's Financial and Real Estate Services, the decision to declare a flood advisory was reached "after careful deliberation of a number of factors," chief among them being the presence of several hundred "exceptionally horny" students waiting to catch a glimpse of the Queer Eye star in the flesh as he slices avocados and answers questions from the audience.

The press release went on to explain that the venue is expected to be to be filled to maximum occupancy for the event. 

"In light of this fact, and in consideration of Porowski's sculpted physique and goofy, boyish charm," it continued, "we have determined that the projected volume of bodily fluids that will be excreted in the theater could cause major damage to the historically significant property."

Students who were lucky enough to grab tickets before they sold out are advised to dress in moisture-wicking attire and comfortable, waterproof footwear. Irvine staff have yet to confirm whether they will provide plastic ponchos for those in the "splash zone" — the area nearest the stage where the beloved Fab Five member will do his cooking demonstration and subsequent Q+A. 

Nonetheless, students can certainly expect a wet and wild evening with Queer Eye's resident gastronomer.