Frat Boy’s Facebook Party Description Awarded the BRO-Litzer Prize for Literature

Mazel Tov, Brett! 

This past Saturday, Brett Thomson (W ‘20), social chair of his fraternity, won the highest of honors in the field of Facebook Event Party Descriptions. 

The BRO-Litzer Prize for Literature recognizes all facets of the Facebook event, from the booze-related puns in the title to the number of purple smiley devil emojis sprinkled throughout the text. The events are carefully reviewed by a committee of esteemed writers who judge the pieces on a myriad of qualifications. 

Thomson’s event, “Declaration of LIT-dependence; Founding Fathers, Federalists, and Four Loko,” was applauded for its historical accuracy, fluid prose, and use of alliteration. 

The committee was especially inspired by the lines, “Don’t forget about the 11th Bill of the Bill of Rights: You have the right to get FUCKED UP!” and “No taxation without inebriation!” 

“I just really wanted to take everyone back to 1776, ja feel?” Brett said. “If you weren’t dumping shots down your throat like the sons of liberty dumped tea down the river, then I needed you get the fuck out of my frat house.”