OP-ED: March Madness? I'm Not Even Done with Seasonal Depression!

So, let me get this straight. The very week it's warm enough to go outside without a goddamn arctic parka, some talking heads in the South decide it's time for March Madness to start? That's just great.

Seasonal Affective Disorder isn't easy in Philadelphia. It's bad enough that winter is cold enough to freeze the pee in your toilet before you can even flush the damn thing, but then all your serotonin decides to migrate south for the winter like it doesn't have a fucking job to do. Add in the concrete landscape, the "wintery mix" oozing from the sky, and a stabbing lack of attractive people out running in tight athleisure, and it's enough to make a person miserable.

All of this would be manageable. All of this. But then, someone decides it's time for March Madness?

As if we don't have enough to deal with, a nationwide plague of insanity is scheduled to seize the minds of our citizens. Does no one care about the national mental health crisis? Is this Big Pharma using its massive Popeye arms to wrestle the country into shelling out more money? I don't know who makes March Madness happen, but whoever's to blame, can you give us a fucking break until summer comes around?