Senior Writes Name of Class in Perfect Handwriting in Flimsy Attempt to Convince Himself He Cares

Last Tuesday, College senior Tim Ganton walked into his ASTR 007 class with zero motivation to take notes. After all, he had just spent an exhausting summer working part-time from home for his uncle’s consulting firm and jerking off twice as much as usual.

When he sat down at his desk, he reached into his backpack for his notebook, which he obviously forgot to buy. Using his experience from the summer, he consulted with a fellow classmate to get a piece of loose leaf to take notes on.

As class was just about to start, Ganton wrote the date on the right side of the page. A good start. Staring at the mostly barren page though, he decided to add the name of the class in big, way-too-geometric letters. Maybe, just maybe, this was the motivation he needed to power through The Big Bang and Beyond and to spend the semester on a cosmic adventure exploring the far reaches of space.

If he could just muster the energy to write the name of the class in a visually pleasing font, he could possibly remind himself what giving a single fuck actually felt like.