Regrade Request: Here's Twenty Bucks ;)

Dear Grader,

I am writing to request a regrade for number three on the last midterm. My answer satisfied everything listed in the problem statement, and I clearly explained my reasoning. Therefore, I believe the points I lost were unwarranted, and it would be great if you could take another look.

That being said, I would like to call your attention to the crisp twenty-dollar bill attached to this piece of paper.

Wouldn’t you look at that: twenty whole smackeroos! How did that even get there? I don't have the slightest.

I suppose I must have accidentally dropped it while writing up this request, and, for that, I sincerely apologize. Oh well, it’s not like I desperately need the money or anything. In fact, I encourage you to keep it, “no strings attached” as they say.

Hmm? Why the long face? Are you perhaps a little disappointed that I had to stoop this low for a good grade? Or perhaps are you currently in the process of reporting me to the Office of Student Conduct? Alright, understandable.

But before you do that, please check the back page of my exam first. What’s this stapled to the back page? Woah...twenty more dollars?!

Bank error in your favor I guess⁠ — all of this moolah is yours! I can already see the outlines of a smile starting to spread across your face. You know, I couldn’t help but notice you’re looking pretty sharp today. Are you doing something new with your hair? Please just give me an ‘A’.

If you ever need anything, know that I am here for you, my friend. To the depths of oblivion, I will follow you. Kindly keep this in mind as you give me full points on number three as well as the rest of the exam.

Sincerely,

Your Biggest Fan