Elon Musk Fails Design 101 Final

Elon Musk, eminent Penn alumnus and Wharton graduate, had re-enrolled at this University a year and a half ago to get a degree in design. Although Musk was an excellent student and had been submitting his assignments only five weeks after the due date and had only “sometimes” smoked in the middle of class, the Tesla CEO was recently crushed to find out that he had failed his design final.

“I’m not sure how this is possible,” complained the entrepreneur. “I mean, the Cyber Truck’s design is so sleek and sturdy. It definitely does not look like a race car from a 1990’s video game, and its windows only shatter in the middle of large, important press conferences and never in any other place.”

In recent years Mr. Musk has been the center of much controversy. His bid to take Tesla private for $420 a share did not amuse his investors and smoking weed live on a podcast caused Tesla stock to plummet. “I guess the business world just isn’t ready for the reefer revolution,” said Elon at the time, shrugging. Shortly after, Musk decided to lay low for a while and return to Penn so that he could “revisit a place where smoking a little weed here or there is not only accepted but expected.”

Unfortunately for Musk, his academic fortunes have not been particularly bright. Najma Smith, Musk’s design professor, expressed extreme disappointment in her student’s final product. “Look, I know the design world is leaning into the ‘avant-garde’ these days, but this is a little much. I’m not sure what was going through his head, but I have to imagine that this design is the result of a drugged-up all-nighter that he pulled the night before the assignment was due.”

When questioned on these accusations, Musk refused to comment.