OP-ED: Galentine’s Day Is Too Exclusive to People Who Have Friends

It’s that time of year again. You can tell that it’s coming when pink starts to show up in all the stores, giant teddy bears are stacked at the tops of aisles, and chocolate starts being sold in the shape of a heart. Many people look forward to this day for weeks, some even months, as it is a time to celebrate their love for all to see. They flaunt their love on Instagram with puns and cliché captions. 

But while other people rejoice on this special day, I’m left nauseated and alone because Galentine’s Day is only a holiday for people who have friends. And to all those people, I’d like to personally request that you stop shoving your goddamn love in everyone’s faces.

We get it, you have friends. You got gal pals, and you all hang out and drink wine and bake cookies together. And cool, you get your own holiday for it. Isn’t that just wonderful? Aren’t you sooooooo special? You and your little friends like to laugh at your inside jokes and post pictures together like you’re better than the rest of us. But you know what? I feel sorry for you. It’s like you need Hallmark to manufacture a holiday so that you can show everyone how much you and your friends love each other. It makes me sick. 

Do I flaunt the fact that I have a really sick magnet collection? No, because I’m not a little bitch! Do I brag about how prosperous my Sims are? No! But I fucking could! And would you still be laughing then? I don’t think so! You’d realize that just because you have friends and you have fun together, that doesn’t make you better than me. Yeah, you buy each other little gifts and exchange little cards, but I just finished knitting a hat for my seventh American Girl doll. So who’s the fucking winner now?