Sophie Seems A Little Too Comfortable in Front of Her (1080p) Webcam

Last Monday during their first online class, students in a freshman writing seminar called the “Art of Persuasion,” couldn’t help but notice that something seemed a little off about Sophie. No, it wasn’t like she was acting super awkward when everyone was video calling. It was actually quite the opposite. She was waaay too comfortable being on video in front of the entire class.

From the second she joined the call, students noticed that something was just a little off. While the video and audio quality of the students’ devices were in the range of literal potato to glorified toaster, Sophie’s voice rang through crystal clear. It was impossible to ignore how sharp and crisp her audio was compared to the robotic screeching of other mics. Even more apparent was her perfect 1080p 60fps video quality. It was top-of-the-line image perfection with every detail perfectly outlined on camera. When asked about it, Sophie nonchalantly mentioned her dedicated webcam, which she apparently used “quite frequently” for other calls.

During class, the professor had to chastise Sophie several times for being a distraction to the other students. She spent the entire class time making faces into the camera and applying makeup on, to prepare for her “next call.” It was also impossible to notice that Sophie was nicely dressed up, contrasting the traditional sweatshirt and sweatpants attire worn by her classmates. She looked ready to put on some kind of show, or something.

Perhaps she had managed to secure a coveted interview for one of those rare remote internships. The professor figured this was the only possible explanation for her dolled-up hair, excessive makeup, and expensive recording equipment. Or maybe she was one of those up and coming college Youtube vloggers he’d been hearing about. Good for her. Even if she was occasionally a class distraction, he was happy to see her entrepreneurial spirit come through during this tough time.