A Trip Into Psychedelic Medicine: I Took Ketamine at a Party

You’re sitting on a couch at the lamest frat party you’ve ever been to. Music surrounds you, and it’s shit -- one of the brothers is playing experimental EDM from his SoundCloud. Finally, your friend approaches you and whispers something in your ear. You smile for the first time in hours and head to the bathroom, ready to snort powder off someone's phone case and enjoy your evening at last. 

And no, Mom and Dad, this is not some irresponsible decision or “proof that I need to get my shit together.” This is ketamine, and now researchers say that it has the potential to help heal from trauma or treat mental illness or something, I don’t really know. But more importantly it can help me to have a bearable time at this party, and scientists agree that it’s fine. 

Researchers saw a need for accessible ketamine in undergraduate populations like that of Penn, particularly because of the high levels of unresolved emotional problems and the fact that absolutely no one on this campus is chill. Luckily, plenty of Penn students agreed and have eagerly participated in completely unobserved, uncontrolled versions of the study by experimenting with ketamine with their friends and a couple strangers. 

In another victory for drugs in the War on Drugs, ketamine and other psychedelics are finally getting the respect they deserve. This bodes well for plenty of Penn students, who can now continue to use the drug recreationally without judgement, and also add “Knowledgeable about the intricacies of cutting-edge psychological research” to their resumes.