OP-ED: I've Been Thinking Recently

Recently, I’ve been thinking. Strange, right? Thinking. Pondering. Wondering. What else is there to do these days? No, seriously, what else is there to do these days?

As I lay awake during the day, I think to myself the craziest of thoughts. And normal ones as well. I think to myself, what would I do if I wasn’t sitting here thinking to myself, but aren’t we always thinking, except when we are sleeping, but I guess dreaming is thinking, but don’t they (who are they?) say that if you can think it, you can do it I think I can I think I can I think I can.

What if cherry tomatoes were switched with grapes? Would there be tomato juice and cheese nights? Would anything really change? What would it take for the leaning tower of Pisa to get back to an upright position? Why does it lean? I think about how asparagus grows sometimes. It just comes right out of the ground. Look it up, I think you’ll like what you see. There are some things I think I’d rather not think too hard about. Like dry cleaning and quantum mechanics and styrofoam cups and slime and when you stare at a word long enough for it to look like you spelled it wrong but it’s actually spelled right. I do find myself thinking about those things sometimes, but not for that long which I think is for the best. If you find yourself contemplating the half life of radioactive isotopes, think again! There are nicer things to think about like kittens and cornbread and halloween and cherry tomatoes. I think that if grapes and cherry tomatoes were switched it wouldn’t make that much of a difference because they are basically the same size but if something like cantaloupe and grapes switched then we would have a serious problem on our hands ha ha. 

I’m not sure anyone has ever thought about that before. I guess that’s ok. Somebody had to think it, and it had to be me for some reason. Recently, I’ve been thinking some thoughts, so there’s that, if that’s something, which it might not be, which would be fine too. I read somewhere that thinking is good for the mind, like puzzles and spinach. That’s nice, I think.