OP-ED: I’m Going to Cabo for Spring Break in a Woke, Leftist Way

I need an escape from the grind, and spring break has arrived as my savior. It will be a week of drinking and partying, one would think. However, I’m different. I’m different from the normal Cancún and Miami excursions. I’m different from the American neoliberal agenda. I’m going to Cabo for spring break in a woke, leftist way, and I’m going to make Papa Marx proud. 

You may be asking, how will I rebel against the capitalistic culture of Cabo? Well, it’s a simple process, and it begins with the my very first step in Mexico. Namely, rebelling against overreaching oligarchies necessitates going somewhere with a lower legal drinking age. How else does one chip away at the government restriction of bodily autonomy?

With my weapon of choice (a strawberry daiquiri) in hand, I make my way to the waters, the perfect location for anti-capitalist discourse. As Marx once said, “let the people darty.” Here, I ask myself the big questions. Is it promoting the Global South if I go south of the border? How will the workers topple Big Infinity Pool? Will Daddy’s allowance be able to keep up with my burgeoning drinking problem? This is the insight and contemplation that precedes true revolutionary thought.

I also enjoy engaging with the locals, or uniting workers across the globe, as I like to call it. Communicating through their language is the best way to show my support to the working class, and that’s why I always say “muchas gracias” to every minimum wage worker I encounter. 

Spring Break need not always be an escape from reality; it can be a method of real change. And with more trips like this around the world, I -- no, we, may rule the world.