If 1 in 5 People in the World Are Actually Chinese, Why Do I Still Have No Ethnic Friends?

I would have voted for Obama in 2008 if I was of age. And probably again in 2012. My former cousin is gay. I can tolerate sushi. I am a progressive. I am committed to diversity, through and through. They say that 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. But if that’s true, why do I still have no ethnic friends?

I’m not necessarily denying the fact that 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. I’m just a tad doubtful. In my friend group of 7, there are 5 white Anglo-Saxon Protestants and 2 white Anglo-Saxon Catholics. I mean, Brett did hook up with that one Japanese chick, but I don’t think that would make him Chinese. I’ll ask him.

In my fraternity, there are a couple of brothers who seem to not be white. I don’t talk to them enough to know for sure, though. My lightweight rowing team also, suspiciously, is all white. Any group of 5 that I create out of them has no Chinese people in it at all. Again, I’m just presenting facts — not taking a side on this debate, but simply sharing my story.

I wish it were true that 1 in 5 people are Chinese. My uncle had a layover in Taipei once and seemed to really appreciate the culture. I feel as if my passion for diversity would make me a great candidate for having ethnic friends. If only there were more Chinese people to meet!