Malaise is the Pantone color of the year. Use that in a sentence today.

"Persnimmon?” What the fuck? 

Et tu, Brute?

The States are most United in their shared touch starved-ness: the source of all health woes.

She was colors and light. She was clouds and trees. She was the water my mother drank while we were in her womb. We are twins, could you have guessed?

Read a poem. Write a poem. Make the mistake of starting something new.

Maybe it was about the friends we made along the way.

Although this event of biblical importance happened over two months ago now, its impact on human life will forever and always be marked as a measurement of excellence and achievement.

Perhaps whatever plastic surgery the keypad of this turnstile got is what fixed all of its problems, and maybe that can be a metaphor for me as well – who will be the plastic surgeon to my heart? 

The 75-year-old professor emeritus was repeatedly asked what classes she was taking next semester, mistaken for an undergrad.

I may not know who JP Morgan is but trust me, my size 2 waist is the real investment.

You're welcome

The horror, goddam the horror. 

I had many laughs.

Usually, you’d say “Sorry, I don’t have any cash on me.” Can’t pull that shit now!

The oppressed majority.

Don’t mince words, butcher them.

I mean...what a fucking creep, right?

This inquiry, pitched to the Penn Carey Law Global Institute for Human Rights, required an elite force of thinkers to tackle the case.

You are so bored and I know how much you hate that.