Please, follow us through our journey to what we like to call The Alps of Eastern Pennsylvania… or… The Poconos.

In an official statement, Magill responded to critics: “To our activists of color, I hear you. I am listening. Next time, I will try and listen a little more closely, though — I think I know what PILOTs are now.”

You could totally pull it off.

Here we all are. Together, on Penn‘s campus, in Philly, and, most importantly, wet.

Cishet men/women dating in a nebulous queer way shall immediately be VPs of the diversity and inclusion committee.

When I met him during move-in my heart skipped a beat. So did my mom's. 

Pour liquid nitrogen onto your feet. Your feet are no longer wet, since they are now solid.

I am a top student at the University of Pennsylvania, not a prostitute.

Indeed, I have even attempted walking closely behind freshmen with hopes of corralling the trailings of their unregulated pheromones into my shell of a body. 

A failed situationship did not derail my life for four months!

Is getting MERTed... finally cool? 

The new curriculum was made possible due to a generous endowment from the Ponzi Foundation.

They will begin leasing the Radian next year as sophomore on campus housing, and you and I are on this cosmic journey together.

I should have known when he said he had a lot of family in Utah.

If I lived in Rodin, all my dreams would come true.

55% of the freshman class identifies as BIPOC (Businesspeople, Investors, People of Capital).

It’s just so hard being so bookish all the time.

Ugh, this is not sliving, Becky!

This kid definitely went to Exeter.

MANIFESTATION IS REAL IF YOU SKIP THIS ARTICLE YOU WILL HAVE BAD KARMA FOREVER!!!! AND A PIANO WILL DROP ON YOUR HEAD AT 11:11PM!!!!!!